Sand Woes

There it is

2011-10-22T19:20:00.000-07:00

here it is, no real story, i just remebered or realised or whatever
i know now why i buried my emotions so deep inside
your world is so boring
i hate your world
i hate living in it, being part of it
what do you even want you stupid universe

Or was it time?

2011-06-10T14:10:00.000-07:00

Tell me a tale, if you dare
a story of yours if you wish to share
i miss my soul, and the humanity that dwells within it
so remind me of a time and place that emits the radiance of a human life

my mind is gone and time within it
but you all seem to know it so well
do you measure time, or does it measure you?
i do not understand, not anymore

shards of memory, flickering through my brain
of a point in life where time existed
but it is so far away
and the shards bring not enlightenment that i may grasp

has my loss of time made me stronger
or simply enhanced my delusions
i see not a world with a stable reality
and you do not live in one

but you seem to rely on a reality as you believe it to be
and you never seem to realise
that the times when your reality malforms
that you change your beleif of reality
to accept that which you see
and not that which is "real"

now i cannot write
for i have an audience
and that distracts me something chronic

Pestilence presto a magic contesto!

2011-04-06T13:01:00.000-07:00

Sardines and sallad beans, in the shopping trolley
pour them in, a simmering din and up the spit will volley
olden oaks and garden folks alike
they all know the sound of a sardine

sardines, yes
a sardine does, and without much desire
swim through the ocean, and from time to time
pick a morsel from the water around it

and from time to time,
probably more often than not
a sardine is taken or eaten or taken then eaten
by a predator, fish four legged or one that on legs stands two

sardines and lonely beans together are eaten by all
but i myself not so fond of the fish
would eat a bean upon a whim,
straight from the vine, or one packaged after freezing
they are rather helpful when one catches themself wheezing ;)

but in time do we think
that like the ancient skink,
these animals and plants may one day be gone?

will they be remembered, or thought of only by the soil that once bore them
ask yourself this, do you see their existence worthwhile?
do they serve divine purpose?

but then again, do you?
you too will be forgotten
and like the sardine, or the mighty stalk bean
you will not be remembered, by you nor those surrounding

then you may say, but a sardine and i
in common not much we do have!
but i say, NAY
for ye and for yae, we all are the same and one same is alike

the universe itself will be gone and forgotten
in a stream of existence and all that is rotten
then again you may say,
if you see things this way
take out the easy way
for we time not have to hear a sour man crying

but i argue once more,
that even in "death"
your existence prevails, not in your conscious
but in your matter
and you matter does matter

for existence is futile and resistance is nigh
but for you i shall put down harsh words tonight
run away if you can
but the faster you run
only closer you come

closer you come
and closer you go
from the truth you run from
and the lies you run to

now you see with your eyes
why we beleive the lies
about life and ill meant meanings
that each fool believes in

for peace of mind is worth more to the masses
than to see through clear glasses
the truth that hides in your own heart

but the truth like your mind
is bent only by you
and you may have the power if you
hard enough try
to change the truth
with that little mind of yours

2011-03-24T00:48:00.000-07:00

AN IMPORTANT NOTE

2011-03-24T00:15:00.001-07:00

*drawing robot bird*

Robot Birds

2011-03-23T00:12:00.001-07:00

I thought it would be really cool if I made a whole bunch of robot Birds and attached pieces of old bone and stuff to their parts
I think they would make really nice pals

The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am

2011-03-18T02:52:00.000-07:00

I'm back

the grocery store floated away down a trickle but after 3 years I'm finally back with the soy and crayons for you Mr. Dao

WHAT!?

YOU DON'T LIKE THEM ANYMORE

WELL FUCK YOU THEN!

>:(

What ever happened to the soon rising crab?

2011-02-03T12:38:00.000-08:00

I feel a great amount of sorrow, as i travel through my past entries, and realise that i never did finish the tale of Crab, the soon rising crab.
Tonight i will give you all a succulent oyster of information about crab.

To re-paint the picture, crab was the alpha crab, the biggest of them all!
And in his lonely world where no more crabs would seed the sand, for lack of soup consumption, ancient crab was determined to open the gates of happiness to humanity.

Crab ventured from his grand clam, slowly he swam through a sea of water.
Above him lay a blanket of dancing light upon the surface, his large crab eyes shed a tear and he swam slowly, around him beneath and beside, the younger crabs were sitting in oaken armchair, pipe in claw, pondering time and space as though they were above their race.

Crab sat, in the middle of the parlour,
"Attention please!" His crab beak did holler.
He went on to explain, a story of fear, bravery and death to the surrounding crabs, truly inspiring if i do say so, for i was there observing in the mist.
But to my surprise, and this be not often, i saw no reaction. A crab or two adjusted his eye-glass and contorted his nose.
Then did come forward, a rather husky old crab, not quite as large as our alpha, named crab.

Said he did these following words, "I be crab, an elder of this protrude, and i see you come here, a lone wolf, crab, you seem to take your pose and read your prose as if to resume us to the eating of soup that does seed the sand for the mass of man!"
An uproar was caused, elder crabs with british accents all yelled and gaffawed!

Crabs sad crab eyes looked down to the deep depths that, below him, brought no vision. "One million years," the words rasped out of his beak, "i have sat and watched the cycle for a million years, and now you fools plan to break the cycle for your own greed? You are no less foolish than the crabs before you, senile in your old age you have forgotten the world and your place in it!"

Not so powerful crab, but still old crab, looked at alpha crab and did say, "You wish for us to return to that unrewarding slavery? WHY NOT GIVE IT TO THE BIRDS!"

Alpha crab closed his crab eyes, he felt that he could not sit by and watch any more, and with one last look around the room he blasted off, out of the sea and to the soup bench in Archus' Wake.

Crab ate all of the soup, and after 2 weeks he was truly more full than any crab ever could be. And then to my amaze, his shell shifted slightly, and cracked open, a pair of wings emerged, and crab flew around the world seeding the sand for all humanity to share.

With this final act he did die, atop the highest mountain, his shell faded and only a grain of perfect sand was left to show.

He had broken the cycle and given the world its final breath before it died its inevitable death within the suns pained smile.

Heart

2011-01-31T06:08:00.000-08:00

Wrenched back from the abyss
where you sat for so long
drenched in flame you embed yourself
within my mind, to destroy my control

in my minds eye you are a demon
best to be forgotten and unforgiven
but once more you return

control my mind and destroy my self
once again i am weak
for you make me feel

So wheres su sap?

2010-12-02T08:19:00.000-08:00

So see the su sought solice in the salty ordained chalice, but with quint quiver of a faulty shiver she sold her counting apparatus.
Why when what where and who, question asking by none other than you, where is of course the only real point for su sap has vanished and no longer in plain sight.
Then again the question of when would be simply delightful to know, for when was she last seen, and by this i do mean, su sap the one in question.
But when also requires where, because time without place is like runners without race and without racing the runners be pointless.
Who is answered already, none other and every.. person knows that we are talking about she
that she called su sap, glance back, glance back
why well of course that would be nice to know but when you dont know what you dont know you know theres no way.

so where is su sap, time being now, and why is she there now is that reasonable?
do you know, for i dont and knowing is a thing that fond of i quite am.

then again if i dont know, my heart will not break so, to hear of the su sap with that which is not me, and not one she aught to be but none of will hear i that.

Take the green leaves, and you will so beleive in the trees that do shed them this time of the year, but of course there are some trees that hold on to their leaves and take them the cold might may well not succeed for these trees, in their age, are tight gripped and dont sway to the whims of the weather that they hold not to pace.
Then i guess the main point would be that su sap may be seen at the tops of the trees, trying to take such held leaves, during winter this be a mighty achievment.

Why would she sap su see her see take the leaves that belong to the trees?

why, once again but why ask more question when you have not received your comfort of answer to the first?

Well well, fickle shell, shell of a fish or a bug, maybe the shell of an atom, are you hiding in a shell su sap does that quell your distaste for your endoskeleeton (purposely misspelled!) or do you like the shell for inside there resides a lovely morsel of gum? but to which flavour do you prefer and why do you fer pre it and would you mind telling me in due time?

so many questions asked but su sap at first glance appears to exist not at all
so why may i ask and you might also ask me why i would ask these things of something that does not and by not i mean is nonexistant?!

Hortley Hurr

2010-11-18T05:33:00.001-08:00

Hortley Hurr a sly old cur
bear his teeth at a mistaken child
swap your drink with an acid vial
Hortley Hurr and his stench ridden fur!

Mean and evil he takes all day
planning and coniving
of dastardly tricks
on all of us that he will play

be aware for with speed he charges
blinded by the wind he flies
towards your face with worms
and into your mouth with them he barges

entering your oesophagus
and down to your stomach
with salty worms he will plummet
your intestines will be his haggus

Hortley Hurr the dastardly curr
to us all he seems so mean
but to himself he is supreme
Hortley hurr with your stench ridden fur

Tap, alap a tap to tap
Sip the lip slip slap
Bop clop top clap
Wuhoah! mean man!

Hortley hurr, was raised by birds
this explains his meanness but not his demeanour
with a shiny toothy smile he runs around
throwing water on the plants
getting sand on his pants

what is it with this Hortley Hurr?
does anyone know?
have you will to find out?
within his beacon tree he hides
afraid of smoke nose moths!

moths with large smokey noses,
how they haunt his dreams
they took his bird family away
as he was a child

alone he was left, to rot in a pit
but the worms pulled him back up
hortley hurr, how your heart must hurt
surely poorly raised by the worms you were
look to the sky, find solice!

Hortley Hurr your screams were heard
a lonely child with a feathered beard
no more need to cry, no need to inflict it on others!
find your friends Hortley Hurr!

Look up and down, all around!
do not give up when face you does a challenge!
you are strong, you have courage!
measly moths cannot stop your flurry!

Come and take the birds back,
for they haunt my place
and the moths left them here laughing,
teasing me with their smokey chuckles

silly moths!

Either nor a silent snore!

2010-11-16T10:35:00.000-08:00

Foul and rotting, as fresh blood clotting
stenches arise and into the night they fly
sit upon pits edge and feel the death awaken

four nights long and not one more
does sit a clouded mind upon the ridge of death
ridge or rift whichever takes your fancy

watch as the silent souls cry
flowing with the rest
none stand out, they are all the same

the pipes of death all lead to the same sea,
as all roads lead to rome
the souls have walked so far, and with destination they are pulled so quickly back to their beginning

where does the walk take us?
does anybody know
do we keep anything from the journey

or do we return to the first stages,
fresh body and an erased soul?
or do we progress somehow

be there target or simply satire
do we embrace that which is easy
or do we take upon ourselves that which is difficult

does it matter?
or are we all surely to small
without point without means

find a point,
find a means
and all life will bow down to your will

do you plan?
do you fear?
do you tire?

lose control and reassemble yourself
your life and mind are simply tools
tools that you may gain power to use

find the power to make yourself into your ultimate dream
end the cycle
bring in the infinite straight

end the cycle

Surly Socks

2010-11-16T00:59:00.000-08:00

Surly Socks loved his clocks and with his hands he would pleasure theirs.
Watch out! Surly Socks is on his way, what do we see today?
His eyes are red with hate and his shoulders raised,
heavy breaths heave through his body...
oh no, someone stole his clocks!

Surly Socks hath had stolen his clocks!
Look out for angry Surly Socks,
he'll swap your teeth and lick your jocks
give him clocks, all the clocks!

The finest clocks from Greensworth Abbey
the smallest clocks from Linchthorpes Tarp
Large grandfathers, none other would he rather
Seven wrist watchers, for magical Surly Socks

Surly raised a large sandy banner,
the centre of town was shadowed for its monstrous size
upon the banner it stood, a warning for all to see
"Steal the clocks, if you must, but dare not to theive from me!"

A message well learnt by town and tourist,
to steal not a surly socks clock,
though they understood his ways, the could not condone his demeanour
"we have an example to set for the children yet,
we cannot allow them to see, rage displayed for you and me"
"Respect must be learnt! Banish surly, his punishment, to teach the children!"

Surly was banished by the towns bird leaders, and so he ventured
all his new clocks on his back borne satchel,
a tear filled his left eye, as he half looked back in remorse,
Four million years he spent, living in his shack, on the street named Bent
Four million years he spent, watching the town grow, watching it through times hard and times bountiful.

But now he had to leave, and suddenly he realised,
a journey..nay! an Adventure would surely be the result of his leaving
Surly Socks took his first steps on the road to nowhere,
without a plan, without a care
he would travel to the ends of the earth,
he would become the master of the clocks!

The Lonely Mountain

2010-06-25T02:17:00.000-07:00

A mountain spurts from the earth, as I walk through all the wonders of life. It blocks my view, but I have a strange attached feeling to the misty top which prevents me from going around. I begin to climb. Blisters almost immediately start to form on my hands and feet, but the feeling grows stronger with each limb I stretch forward. My hands start bleeding when I get to the halfway mark and I cry out in pain with every move, but continue to climb. All of a sudden rocks fall from above and with a big yelp of pain I swing off a ledge and catch another side of the mountain. It almost felt like it was just my bones that were connecting with the mountain, all trace of humanity in my hand had long gone, but now only a third of the way from the top, the attached feeling surpassed any form of physical pain.

I climbed even faster than I did before, but the mountain started to boil under my skin just before I reached the top. I felt as if I would melt when suddenly a hand reached out of the mist and scooped me off the cliff face. When I came to I could see about a foot in front of me and no one around me but I immediately felt better. All my wounds were healed and the searing pain was gone. The feeling was stronger than ever before and I began to call out “HELLO! Is there any one here?!” I started feeling my way around as I called out but no one replied. When I realised I was alone, the feeling turned to a strong longing and then I’d realised what happened.

I was on the same mountain as before.

The Outer Rim

2010-06-13T17:32:00.000-07:00

The man took a draw from his cigarette which lit up his face under a black broad-brimmed hat in the gloomy room. The only light came from a high barred window. Dust particles hit the diagonal rays of moonlight and drifted slowly to the ground. It was a bare room, with nothing but a simple table in the middle of the room which seemed to attract the moonlight, and a massive door opposite the window. The limestone walls felt as if they were crushing the lifeblood out of the room, leaving it foreboding and melancholy. A perfect scenario for the man in the corner. He stood up and tossed the butt of his smoke to the ground after one last draw.
He was dressed in long black robes which lightly scraped the floor as he walked toward the table, avoiding the beams of light. He stood with his back to the door facing the table so he was still fully enveloped in shadows and he began to chant. It was a sound the Earth had not heard in millions of years and shook its very foundations. Time seemed to fall back on itself, repeat and twist in ways that didn't even seem plausible in a fantasy. He continued his chant and raised his arms, there was no longer the room, only the table covered in moonlight, the door behind him and the images twisting and contorting all around him. He chanted louder as his arms got higher and higher until they were above his head. All of a sudden he clapped them together in front of him and crossed his legs.
There he sat, in a hovering meditation, eyes closed, the void of time still shifting and changing around him. The moonlight on the tabletop had shifted into a silver veil which covered the table. A figure appeared on the other side of the table, completely naked with a cloth wrapped around his eyes, in the same hovering meditation as the man with the broad-brimmed hat. They did not use their mouths to speak...
We cannot look at what cannot be seen, the naked man's voice had a strange accent the man with the hat could not discern. The voice crept back into his mind, life is the energy that created the universe, and the energy of the universe created life. Stare through the veil and become one with the universe, with no true form but with the feeling of every life in it connected as one, or take the door behind you and you shall have your human form again.
The man with the hat knew why he was here. He lifted his head and opened his eyes, which were staring directly at the cloth-eyed man. I am ready, the man with the hat communicated. The naked man faded out. Slowly, the man shifted his gaze downwards to the veil. The moment his eyes hit, coils of space seemed to crack and break all around him, Time was not even a concept anymore and all the man felt was falling. His hands started groping something soft. At first he didn't know what it could be. His legs and buttocks began to feel it aswell. He felt it for a bit longer when he realised, he wasn't falling, he was sitting and the thing he was groping wasn't any unknown object of space and time.

It was the couch in his living room.

2010-05-30T05:23:00.000-07:00

The old man sat, waiting. For what, he no longer knew. Nor for how long. Months? Years? Centuries? He had no idea.
And he did not want to know. This small dark room was his home, was where he belonged. He moaned as he clenched his stomach and released another prize into the ragged mess of cloth that was once his pants. He smiled and cackled to himself, oh how sweet life was!
He felt along the sides of his walls with his hands,searching for anything of interest. His eyes withered along time ago. He cawed in surprise as his bony hands
came across what appeared to be a small worm. Carefully he grasped it and brought it before his face.
"Of what do you seek in my realm, worm!" the old man enquired in his thin, frail voice.
The worm emitted a high frequancy hum of such force that it vibrated the confined metal surroundings around it.
THe old man had not come across this language before, and was baffled. He noted some similarity to the dialect
of the Uzank tribes.
"Ah friend, you must be from up north. A refugee from the wars for sure."
He held him up close and whisipered into his ear.
"I will keep you safe friend, it is dark times indeed. But i will keep you safe and warm."
He unzipped his satchel, kept on a strap around his bare chest, and placed the little worm inside. Right next to the old man's mothers placental sack. No harm will come to him in here he thought.
Suddenly the sound of metal scraping filled his ears! He felt warm light his his flesh. He screamed, a painful terrifying scream. Voices he heard.
"Woah man, theres a dude sitting in this bin! Holy shit it smells fucking horrible."
"That is just freaky, c'mon lets leave him alone. He is scaring the shit out of me."
The noises stopped. His room returned to its normal darkness. The old man's quickened, panicked breaths began to return to normal. What are these creatures that keep appearing he wonders, what are they saying? Why wont they leave me alone?
The old man sobbed and moaned for hours, until he fell into a nightmare filled sleep. He would not awaken for 10 more weeks.

And so it was

2010-05-29T17:21:00.000-07:00

Once it was said, it was to be.
A dog walking beside the sea
taking its strides it looked to the side
and what did it see?

It saw not the sea, on the other side it be
it saw the banks
banks banks white sandy tanks
clicking clockety clank

and where was his journey
along the sea shore
to lead him today, tomorrow or more
nobody knows, its a dogs life after all

slip through the fingers do the grains
a mystical substance
sandy sand produced by the sandeus gland
a gland of great power, a gland of pure magic

the dog looked to the side, then continued straightforward
trotting at a leisurely pace he took his time, but won the race
the race was of course to go where he would
but with no destination he walked or trotted or galloped who knows

all we know is that no matter how far he goes,
he will end at his final destination
as does a sopping worm

A thousand years

2010-05-22T17:31:00.000-07:00

spend a thousand years to think, take your time and ponder
a million days had passed before, now take your mind beyond
the walk of life has taken you, far away but no further than your beginning
have you learned?
have you heard, smelt touched and tasted, have you seen
do your eyes see anymore? have you thought
deeper than your deepest thoughts, beyond the walls that keep you here
is your mind caged?
are you caged by your mind or your mind caged by your world
the people around you, are they real, do they hold true existence within their limbs?
listen to your sinew, it will tell its tale, the earth and sky and all between a million tales
think of your achievments, are you proud, will you remember, will you remember when your walk is over? will others remember or will you be gone?
should you care? thats not how it seems, you were not asked to exist but simply forced into it, or were you eazed into existence
Who knows?
do you remember your first breath?
do you remember the first surge of energy, the one that brought you life
do you know how you were created, do you crudely pretend to understand
a whisper on the wind, a scream under water
nothing is truly clear, your senses will fool you, but will your sense bring you knowledge, will it remind you of your fabric
fabric, the fabric of time, the fabric of flesh, all fabric, it can be unwoven, re-woven and it can be torn
but what do we know, should we live a life with no meaning, with no direction, do you create your own direction?
do you understand your direction, where do you think your walk will take you?
it will not take you very far, no matter how fast you walk, or for how long, you will end up in the same place.
with your dieing breath you will surely remember the beginning, you will remember and be forgotten
but what does it matter, noone else really thinks about it, noone else really cares, just accept what others say, just forget that your life will end and spend your walk enjoying as many sights as you can see
fair enough i say, but if you look closely that isnt what people do, they just sacrifice and sacrifice, learning to accept the way they make things
are you one of those people?
do you think that you aren't because i doubt you will go against the flow, noone likes to go against the flow of others
i dont know if it is just me that feels this way, or if many people do
but what do i know, what do you
i dont think we will ever know

Why hello there magical trickster!

2010-05-13T06:16:00.000-07:00

Why hello, i said, that i did i said it and of course it is true that its said!
Why hello there magical trickster of mystical blisters!
And what it is that you would ask, it is what to ask of me, that it was the reply?
A piece of time, time that is yours, maybe now, maybe earlier or maybe in the near future?
Why of course, why not take all three my ludicrous friend!
And of couse i would, yes you know, i would repay you in kind, with time of mine and smiles all day!
That sounds rather fancy, maybe later, i am of course not quite sure what you want yet!
ah yes, my point that was, my initial request is that you show me a wonderous trick!
A trick? of course, i am the magical trickster after all!

HAHA i boomed! My satisfaction is almost overreaction, pure pleasure of great traction!
To say the least im pleasured thoroughly by your enthusiastic mouth motion!
Well then, care, would you, to show me this trick, oh be it enticing? be it captivating?
That i am not sure, and neither are you young fellow, for you see as the magical trickster my tricks are tricky and tricky they be for you cannot watch and see!
Ooh i said smoothly, does this mean you will surprise me?
Of course not! a surprise is a prize for captive eyes, and your eyes young man are less captive than they may well be!
But that is not true, i am captively awed by you, o' wonderous lord!
Is that so?
It is so!
Is it?
Yes i do beleive it is!

Then watch closely my young man
Of course!
Tricks and traps on the tar bean claps put your hands out straight and *POOF!*
He was gone!

A tale of fortune

2010-05-07T06:04:00.000-07:00

Taken on the day of borrowed coins, a story long and forgotten now, this record was.
Prelude to initiaton is a note, that without a broad valley inside your mind, will you never make sense of what is laid down upon these digital pages.
The time has come, to recognise knowledge as your ally, and perform magical ceremonies to remove ignorance from your life.

The cold winds flowed, with hollow whispers of truth, a construction or combination of human flesh and rigid metal churned and clicked through the wastelands known once by many as home. The sun seared but the clouds hats above, slim slivers begging permission to pierce the ice that had long captured the land.
The machine man or man machine had spent a thousand eons searching for the answer, the answer to the riddle, the riddle holding life hostage. Not just humanity, but all life that had once lived had been sent to the after life, not life after, but the existence after life, in all reality no existence at all. Through the wasteland he had marched, the earth itself was still barely alive, beneath miles of ice a molten core continued to flow. The man machine thought to himself, even though the humans had managed to exterminate all on the surface nature it self would still prevail.
For you see the humans had spent their short time constructing and destructing, improving and repressing all at the same time, eventually this process lead nowhere and with the combined fear and foolishness nonexistence was the only product.
Alone in on the world the man machine did not rest, he paced his way through the barren remains, on a journey with no destination, he need not sustenance, that had long been removed from his needs.
He knew not his creator, but he liked to imagine, he imagined it was a righteous one with pure intentions, he liked to imagine that he had been born with purpose. All those around him agreed, proving him right, though, of course, he was alone. In reality he had created himself, to an extent, what he was now was not what he was before, but now he was better, he beleived.
He had weapons, to defend himself from himself, to attack himself, for a greater profit, a profit that would undeniably be of no real worth. He had educated himself with knowledge about himself, he made assumptions about his very foundations, about the foundation of existence, though he may be wrong, he was not argued with and so he felt proven correct.
He had no contact with anything at all, he had forgotten how to read the other animals and the plants, for they no longer existed, he did not beleive in the myths of other animals or plants because he had never seen them, or so he beleived.
Long forgotten were the words of his elders, but they no longer existed, in his memory or his reality, the mistakes past made, by him and by others like him before him, has been forgotten, and so the lesson they had taught was also wasted, like all things in the wasteland.
This was the riddle, that noone posed and noone knew, the riddle that was the truth, its answer sublime, but where was the riddle? Noone dared search for it, did they truly beleive in it?
Their time was wasted, they spent it in fear of the ones that sat on a throne of power, the entire world owned by a single fearsome entity.
Where were the people? noone knew, all thought was a collective selfish motion, to go against it was foolish, to try and change the pace was impossible, unless you sat on the throne of power.
The flow of course did lead to the wasteland, time is not as we beleive, the present the past and the future are part of the river, our time is flowing to the death of what we can prove to be the only planet of supported sentient being.
To stop this who is? noone is and there never will be, for without the power to change the flow of time you have no control over your fate, and without the plan to destroy humanity you have not the chance to gain the power to change that fate.
One can only be thankful, thankful that they needn't experience the final fall of mankind, feel the satisfaction of having no responsibility, feel no guilt for you know not the consequences of your actions.

2010-03-25T06:59:00.000-07:00

2010-03-25T06:48:00.001-07:00

Since it has been so long, I thought id post something special to celebrate my return. An image that is very important to me.

Tale of the Robotic sand worms

2010-03-16T05:12:00.000-07:00

Sit around the camp fire lads, tonight be it a tale of sorrow and unbound freedom.
For your enjoyment, tis a tale to be told through form of poetic prose,

Trapped in chains the wild worm sings
a deep and shaking bellow,
a song that tears at the edges of the earth
the giant worm, in pain eternal
cries for solice, in his dark solitude

As he lies, bound by chains
he sings his tale
a song of fear
a song of hate

Many years ago did the black birds fly
flew they did above earths sight,
flying through space they flew
like swimming feathered fiends
through space and sky they fly

worms o hiding in the ground
find you soon, through shrieks of sound!
we birds of clamour, birds of DEATH!
the birds circled the earth,
centuries of birds and hundreds of planning
crying like demons, shrieking

the worms lay still, in their resting burrows
eating earth, devouring tunnels
unaware, that soon their end be made
by feathered fiends

Birds circle, through novas and time
untrue existence, born through hate
birds that were strong, in surreal energy
cursed were their calls, blackened their names
to crush and devour
control and destroy
their only desire

millenia of uninterrupted process,
worms that were once young,
now old
grow and tunnel,
and they die, to create more earth,
and thus it continues

celestial creatures, the worms
falling through their own ectoplasmic ridicule
the ancient seer worm, a mighty beast
with feathers ornamental, he sat upon his throne
his mind clambering through time and space
he sees

but black birds
hidden and despicable
unseen by the seer of all
possibly impossible,
to see all and not to see
the demons born of hatred
and unreliable promise
of pretencious eternity
none lay bare, weighed down by vain colossus

Birds descended
worms retented
all lifes gaze
gone
life shut out
by ethereal birds
controlling minds, controlling fear
eating the souls of the ones to bear
and creeping shadows
of pain and spite
swimming through the tunnels,
made by epic worm might

the birds consumed, and through their consumption
they materialized,
sudden fluctuations
flowed through worm nations
unstable energy, disturbing
interrupting the process,
worms died off, immortal as they were
one can always have the power to destroy ones self
this power abused by the birds
created their own existence

the final worm
lying on the pit of his own existence
no further down could he dig, he had reached the end
his cries, his song
to be heard and responded, only by the birds that destroyed his race

the seer gathered what was left of his might,
released it all, released his rage
his sadness, he released the truth
no process was eternal, all was eternal
all if in the void of nothing recurring indefinetly

the birds after a millenia of gluttonous life
orgies and laziness, they fed off the now passed worms work
unaware of the final beast, lying next to death
releasing his final redemption

the seers song was almost finished,
his mind began to flow once more,
with vision
with memory
and with memory, came hate
the hate boiled so strongly

the planet shook, the birds took flight
shocked, caught unaware the ground cracked and erupted
pure energy flowing from the seer to the ends of infinity
the birds were incinerated, their material bodies turned to ash
their spirits, still bound to the void that was life
returned, as all energy does
to the flow

The seers final action sewed the seeds
of yet another loop, process of recurrence
on a scale so large, unfathomable to those within
as are all things, part of one loop,
that is part of a larger loop
lost in infinity
the seer died, as his last vision was as far as comprehension could be.

A long time ago

2009-07-06T00:06:00.000-07:00

Many many days ago there was an old man with seven dogs.
He kept his dogs in prime condition, with sleek coats and rabid tongues.
The dogs loved their old man and kept him warm and sexually pleasured.
One day the old man went out into the woods to find some Megaberries, but he never came back.
The dogs were not worried at first because the old man would sometimes go out and not be back for a few hours later than he said.
But after many hours passed the dogs became worried, and so they all left the house in search of him.
Dilly Dally Dog picked up his scent straight away and charged in its direction.
Sloppy Bo Dog searched in all of his favourite nooks, but found no evidence of old man.
Gilligan Dog transformed into a large bird and flew overhead to try and find old man, but had no success.
Mulligan Nose Dog turned into a pile of stones and could not change back.
Egg Fanascio Dog searched sand and soil for old man but found only sand and soil.
Murky Waters Dog searched the sea and found all manner of critters that were not old man.
And Bellico Balabodaobo Dog searched for old man in the corny fields and found him!
Old man was lost in the corny fields after chasing a rather cheeky Nose-Worm that has taken his berries. Bellico Balabodaobo Dog turned into an Elk and old man rode upon his back all the way home.
His home was a small cottage made of wooden logs laying horizontally and stacked to the roof, which was made of yellow straw and twigs. The front door was made of solid grey granite, but it was no trouble for old man to open, he was a mighty beast of a man.
Once home old man took Bellico Balabodaobo Dog to bed, as he plunged his broken and cobbled penis into Bellico Balabadaobo Dog he cried out "look out below!"

THE END

sand

2009-01-31T07:43:00.000-08:00

a long time ago before man or carrion there was sand
sand o mighty called upon by ancient gods to reign the land and sky
before mammal or lizard it lay upon the earth with golden shine
it lay there for millenia waiting to be awoken by the beasts that would someday rise from within
and from within came a power so great
a power never before seen
a power known to all as soy
this is the story of sand and how the world came to be

old planbaot saw an empty space within the universe a place untouched by the other seeds
planbaot saw opportunity, for within this universe he had only seen darkness, and within it was only the distant stars to gaze upon
planbaot felt alone and so he decided it was time to create something new
something never before seen
from within the depth of his mind planbaot conjured a power so great and placed it inside his small arena

within this arena were several other planets that he had created, his planet of molten earth, several formations of spherical gas clouds, an ice moon and an aquatic planet
all was boring in this vast space of bland formations
and so planbaot created his masterpiece, a planet composed completely of sand
sand was an unkown supstance to the other great seedy, for they had all lifeless and deserted planets, but to planbaot the land of sand would be the very first self sustaining planet, one of great comfort and enjoyment

within his planet the sand flowed freely, consuming all else, and all that was consumed was to be digested and would re-emerge as sand.
for millenia and decades this planet of sand ruled supreme, besting all the other great seeds work with its divine power

and so planbaot was consumed with happiness, planbaot was so in love with his planet of sand that not only did he admire it, he wished to become one with it
and so planbaot released a part of himself, one of his eyes, as a great seed has many
planbaot sent the eye to the core of the sandy planet to be consumed and so emerge as sand

planbaot thought his plan ingenious, yet he was yet to realise the great darkness within
and a great darkness it would be
for many years planbaots eye resided within the sand planet, and planbaot grew impatient, for he wished to see himself emerge as grand sand.

planbaots impatience would be his folly, for he sent more eyes, more and more of himself into the sand planet, he payed no attention to how little of himself was left, and one day planbaot sent the very last part of himself to the heart of the sand planet

and there he saw an eternal darkness, one from which no exit, no escape was fathomable
planbaot had forsaken his strength as a great seed, to become part of this sand planet

ages passed, and planbaot was all but forgotten among the now ancient seeds
so long had passed that a new seed had taken his place, unkowing of the danger that lurked within the mysterious planet of sand
this new son payed no attention to the planet, as, being a new seed, he thought it useless and weak
...but so wrong he was

for the new seed had been forcing stray earth together, preparing a new planet, one which he thought would be the only life sustaining planet
blind to his own ambition the new seed continued to increase the size of this new planet, and had not seen how large the sand planet had become

another age passed and the new planet had grown to its optimum size, matching that of the sand planet, the new seed was proud and turned his eye to that of the now imposing sand planet, he understood not what had happened here long ago
for it was now emitting a sound, a murmur among the dead metropolis that was the universe, uncaring he turned a blind eye and continued to maintain construction of the new planet

now we look to the sand planet, to its ghostlike plains of sand
it was in all an amazing planet, sand being the greatest of all elements
and on the surface the planet was beautiful, a wonder to the eyes pleasing in its sands of eternal time
but as with all things in the reality in which we exist, the surface is merely a cover over the true existance of a being, and deep within was held the truth behind the planet of sand

within the depths of the golden grain there was a deep pit
a pit in which sorrow and hatred had been brewing for more than a thousand ages
for this to be comprehendable one must understand that an age is roughly 2150 human years
and for hatred and sorrow to be brewing for this long without end, is a long time, and a lot of hatred

for within this vast darkness planbaot had been consumed by the sand, but outsmarted by his own creation planbaot would not become sand, he was destined for an act of great evil, and, aware of his own mistake planbaot was now so full of rage that he would act out in his defence, and for thousands of ages he had been gathering his power

though once again planbaot would be outsmarted, for all along the sand had been expecting this
upon his finaly moment of gathering his energies planbaot released a collosal burst of pure energy
the energy spread through the universe in what we could call a split second and then it was gone

all of the great seeds had been killed, their sentient being destroyed to remain a hulking husk of burning elements
and
upon the planet that had been created by the former new seed, life suddenly appeared it started out small, and formed into larger and more complex being and now as i write this we exist in a stage of creation in which humanity dominates the planet

and what ever happened to the sand planet?
the pure energy had created a point of immense gravity, so much that would create what we call a "black hole" but, the copious sand surrounding it had been sucked in, along with other elements and chunks of earth nearby to create a planet resembling a scar
a burnt and dead planet, that once again has been gathering sand
a planet known to us as mars

but one day
after ages have passed
there will once again emerge an grand seed
one to ressurect the dead

and he will repair the scarred universe that we live in
but neither you or i will live to see the day
and so within its own importance lies a fact that is uninteresting to some
but without knowledge there is no power
and with no power there is no sand
but that is enough for now

on a final note i must say
i beg for the day when sand will rain from the skies once again
and for planbaot to arise king of all

Farthee Walker

2009-01-28T00:48:00.000-08:00

Farthee Walker, hardly a talker
in search of disorder
that old Farthee Walker

Carts claps hollington dale
Daring to tap the old curraway shale
can you see the water deep be it may
but see you its depths in fear and dismay

old Farthee Walker saw down
all depths unkown to you and me
all those depths did he see

but walk alone he did
and walk he did not
for in this water
he swam

cold thick and dark be the water
to most horrors unseen
but old Farthee Walker saw
and feared not this dark sea

for down in the depths
he did see
the lost love of his
the old oaken tree

nor sardine or perch
nor finned beast or whale
not crustacean or tutrle
no

only oak saw Farthee
and that may it be
the forest below
sun did it not see

but large oaken friend
with nor light nor guide
did Farthee descend
to heed its lone cry

for hidden within
the canopy great
lay a deep seeded beast
the beast you call hate

and Farthee indeed
had searched all alon
for hate unseen
to sing his death song

to unleash unbridled power
upon friend and foe alike
hatred unfathomable
to Farthee's delight

death in his wake
from the sea of depths unknown
Farthee swam back
to greet unpleasant shallows

but found did he
old hairy Farthee
that within embracing his hate
had he lost his breath back
for the surface to make.

2008-06-21T21:16:00.001-07:00

Old Fands Geeth

2008-06-16T15:58:00.000-07:00

Back to the days, old days back and far to the nights of winter in Ushnars Scar.
The coldest taps from stormy winds glowing fast in the nights humming din
for the old men working in the mines for the clams found no food nor their gold
the rude sand clasps fell to the arden carrot masts and there was nigh sound nore silence
for when the eager not yet old boys from the lands far away
sent their spirits and their bodies to the fray
the clam burdened finches from the blood red lands of gore
through their putrid flesh they tore

and none seeked out the cats, cats of old nor cats bold
and to their ultimate doom it was made
the end of plays and the sand ridden days
in the deserts that now seem so far away

but unless man takes a carp
to the sand warp
no carp with shall he die
but with the carp
disgusting carp
dirty fish
with it he will fly

and no more birds he will see
and wish he were more so
like them than the pile of shit he be
for now this man
turned to beast
is a bird

no man should ever wish
not on his clams nor his life
not on his own name
to be a bird nor a fish for the matter either
one be horrid the other disgusting
respectively in that order
and no sand can they grasp not one grain

and to sit and confuddle
confuse sit and think
not one moment will idea come from their brain

for clams clasps cats all start with c
but a fish lives in the sea
and both high seas and small c are quite unlike

without girdle or fine silk
none of that
none of that
without girdle or fine silk will they climb

and to climb is to find
the old torn cans of callmisth bind
and to find these things oh my friend is quite divine

old trees are quite nice
but not so nice
oh not so nice
for those old trees house birds

but with those birds come cats oh mighty cats
and those birds do the cats take away
and one more thing
yes but one more
one more thing to place on the back
those beautiful cats to take away fish as well

and so a world with cats is a world so great for a world with cats has no birds nor fish
and both birds and fish are rude

2008-06-13T18:13:00.001-07:00

The great Sap Tap; as whispered by Pucas

2008-06-13T17:04:00.000-07:00

the great sap tap

oh how I clap for the sap tap

more, more, more

give it to me

give me more sap

drizel it upon my nose

slip it down my breast

gush it all over my legs

give it to me, your sap o forth from tap

the sap tap does not hat wear as rap a rap rapper will clap a slat

but slap the rap rapper with sap

none shall clap them no more

as the great sap tap has sap

and the black rap o rapper has no sap

surely does not hold a cat

for the cat wishes to play with the sap

give it to me

more, more, more

I would like to smell sap

but not on a cat

as a cat has nice texture

and sap is of a sticky essence

but upon a window slat

the bees would ride

give it to me

nao nao nao

sap from the great sap tap

or a cat hat so i too can be a cat

the bats have stolen the great tap

and dont allow refunds to the cats

for their purchase of sap

which is now old

fin.

A small addition to the ancient archives.

2008-06-04T20:13:00.000-07:00

Old burgundy mushroom cap

old coil of and old mans cat

sand o wither from thine tap

oh burgundy mushroom cap

Old sap falling down
down down down

Old sap falling down
all the way to the ground

Old sap all the way to the

ground

ground

ground

ground

Old sap falling all the way down

Old old bird, evil bird
how i hate and dispise bird
old man bird dirty bird go away!

old man bird all ive heard
is that dirt call you slurred
caw caw CAW

old man bird how i dispise thee

dirty birds
stupid birds
ugly scary old man birds

but of all birds
dangerous birds
dangerous birds go AWAY

go away for you call
none other than
oh you will call
that old soup bird
and once that bird
your call has heard

shall he come as the bird
oh not just dangerous
not just dangerous bird
oh that bird shall arrive
dangerous...soup... BIRD

Leave you bird for heard
you call i have
and for all i have
i will not have you here!

Out of my house
out of my way
out of my day like a great old DANE
out out out bird oh
dastardly dangerous mean and ugly soup bird

you follow me to work and home
to clams old house to corbens garden gnomes
you follow me all day long
scare me with your dangerous soup song

leave me bird for i wish the last ive heard
of your song of the dangerous soup bird

just trying somethign

2008-05-25T05:30:00.000-07:00

Sad lost and forgotten spirit

2008-05-22T06:00:00.000-07:00

welcome round chaps, welcome round
round and round to the old shoe town taps and beagles all the same!
where is that shapless sand? what of it? hahaha!
and , and the old tooth beach? hahaha!
finches really quite swiftly flying all the way round the clock tower!

..
..
..
hahaha!

and noone to hear their cheeps but me!
ME! hahahhaha!

old finches new finches no silly taps
all i want are cats my love all i want are CATS
cats all white black blue and burgundy
cats like cats will always sit on the windows edge!

hungry little cats hunt a bird hunt a carp!
hungry little cats eat their food like a cat
cats cats cats cats cats cats cats cats cats
what about more cats!

all i see are cats these days
all i see are cats!
all i want are cats to PLAY!
all i see are cats!
all i have to talk to now are
all i have to eat for dinner
all i have to dance all day long are cats! ho ho ho ho cats!

where were you last time you met mr cat?
why i was right here but a second ago?!

how can cats be oh so taps
but oh no taps no silly sily taps
just cats oh cats oh cats oh cats
cats oh cats oh cats oh cats!
cats drink milk
cat drink water
...
but what if the water drank the cat?

!!!
cats oh cats sucked in through the taps!
cats drank water and now the water wants it back
cats all the cats in the world all gone back!
all gone for a little dip to give some water back

Burgundy cat: "oh well isnt that nice, a nice little ending yes an ending that was rather nice."
Dangerous birds: "beware the dangerous soup bird"

oh but cats neednt be afraid for cats fraid not of a bird
but oh the soup bird swoops like soup burns and cats oh cats are far too slow
slow too slow oh what shall they do
cats oh deary me cats

i wish i were a cat so i would just fit in with the rest but i cant be a cat unless i like to wear a cat's hat

many cats like hats normally round hats with full brims but i dont like hats at all!
so how can i be a cat if i dont like the hat, hat that cat like more than that?
but if i keep saying words like cat mat bat rat fat splat hat will you think that after that youll say WHAT AHAAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAA

HI HELLO HAHA HELLO? HAHA HOW ARE YOU? YES MY NAME IS LUKE HELLO! HAHAHA

More of the tale of Pucas: The battle atop Soy Plateau

2008-03-07T05:48:00.000-08:00

Finch Farthington, the forefather of soy and life itself, was making his way past the planet on which we humble ourselves during his celestial odyssey throughout all eternity.
Farthington sensed a great disruption in the soy energies surrounding the planet, and so he flew down, to the top of the soy plateau to investigate what issues had arisen. Upon his arrival Farthington was greeted by chaos, the finches were battling against Cobblestone Crows, amidst the battle Farthington spotted old man, upon his soy throne, leading the Grand Finch Army against the Crows. Farthington swooped down and snatched up old man in his finch claws,

"What chaos have you brought down onto the Finches, and so dooming them into the shadow of Felhardr?!"
"Beard fell to the lust of daybreak and so battle was wagered against him and the Cobblestone host."
"With old days gold, dark nights cold and old friends bold, you lose to me the beard of which held you alive old fool."

But both old man and Finch Farthington knew that this was as the prophecy had once long days ago foretold, and that the day of damnation was upon them.

With no more time to waste old man and finch returned to the battle, and so with the finch king and lord of all soy by their side, the finches battled the crows with valour and brutality that had never before been seen by man. But with all their power and skill, the finches fought a neverending onslaught of fearless crows, and with the sun close rising the finches were tight for strength.

Far north the trolls heard the shrill craws of crows, and the almighty scream of finches,

from friend to foe long ago
trolls and finches gone that through
trolls finches through gone that friend from foe
foe to friend and friends on foe say troll of northern shire.

and so the trolls of the north came to aid their finch allies in the battle. Little did they know of the powers coursing through their hardened skins, and how they would come into play within the coming days.

The finches of the soy plateau were drawing back further and further into the fortress, battling without end, and without victory against the Cobblestone Crows. Old man sat once again atop the fortress, upon his darkened throne, Finch Farthington circling above had called the trolls of the north, as the crows allies, the crusaders of Gladowynch, were almost atop the flattened mountain citadel. The crusaders, though skilled, were small and few in number, compared to the trolls of the north, and after the crusaders were cut off, the Crows would be forced to slacken their attack, giving the finches time to withdraw enough of their soycerers to the Acrane keep.

Already, half of the finches plateau was bathed in sunlight, and under command of the Crows, if the trolls did not pick up their feet, it would be the final day for finch and soy alike, but though their chances were bleak, the finches did not surrender, and fought on with valour.
Old man sat atop his throne, summoning the Guardian of Soy, a long old finch that had bound his body and soul to soy, and become a powerful beast, but doomed to forever dwell within the wastes of soyblivion, until summoned by a master of soy such as old man, but even with his great power, old man needed time to summon the guardian, time that was running out on him, and his companions.

"if only old beard were still here, to aid me in my time of need..." thought old man, and suddenly he was swept into memories long past.

Old man and old beard were setting fire to the homes of children and the humans, and later laughing at the screaming, burning corpses.

Old man remembered climbing to the very top of the soy plateau using no soy energy, only the enrgy of friendship from his friend old beard.

Old man remembered playing with beard as a small child, laughing with eachother and getting messy before needing to go home for dinner.

Suddenly old man awoke again from his memories and continued to summon the great guardian, now fueled by anger and sadness, old man's power was becoming extreme. Finch Farthington realised this and came down to old man, as he feared his power would exceed old mans capacity and destroy him. Farthington looked deep into old mans mind, and warned him of his rapid increase in power. Old man replied with a loud howl of rage, and the ground of the plateau began to crack, vaporized soy shooting up in jets out of the cracks, a loud explosion and a wave of soy rushed over the plateau, the guardian rose slowly from the pit.

The crusaders began to set foot atop the plateau at this time, and were beginning to gather in numbers, to launch a strike past the guardian and into the heart of the fortress. The blackened finch guardian, drenched in soy, was destroying the endless rabble of crows coming to assault the finches, the guardian was not completely stopping the crows from reaching the fortress, but slowed the pace considerably, giving the finches time to organise their defences, but with the charging crusaders, the finches would not last long, the guardian already fixated on the crows could not aid them either. The finches felt their rage begin to drip to fear, time was running out, and their fates were looking bleak. The first wave of crusaders was already organised, and was charing across the feild to the fortress, clad in steel with burning blades, they were a fearsome sight to the finches, that had only just received a break from constant battle.

Old man ordered the finches to keep their concentration on the crows, and to ignore the oncoming crusaders, and so the fnches took to the skies, keeping out of reach of the dirty men below. Old man summoned the armor of Soy Gladys, a powerful warrior from ancient times, before Finch Farthington, and Grishnacks sword of woe. clad in steel the crusaders had already made their way into the reception of castle finch, Old man stood his ground at the entrance to the throne room, awaiting the intruders arrival.

Outside Finch Farthington and his Finch warriors were starting to bring the crow battalions near a halt, surely soon they would return to their dens, to recruit more of their kind to continue the battle, but suddenly, from unseen vantage, the sky above the plateau opened, toa vortex of sunlight, and crows poured out, Finch fathrington, the guardian and the finch warriors steeled themselves, awaiting the first wave to strike.

Old man had joined battle with the crusaders, fighting with amazing skill and speed, he had killed many men, but many, many more came. Old man was beginning to lose ground to the crusaders, and he had nowhere else to run. The crusaders had him circled, he could no longer fight for his survival, as they slowly moved in on old man, a great roar was heared, and the a wall was broken through, the trolls charged through, beating the men effortlessly. Old man, though pleased to see them fell to his side and passed out from the previous battle.

Pucas's tale

2008-03-04T00:38:00.000-08:00

The wind was sweeping, the stars were sleeping.
the soy was cheeping the cranberries weeping
and all along he was standing, on the golden hills of Herryborough.
the man with the golden nose, seven fingers and an old brown shoe.
the old man said to his friend, old beard "where did they go, those long days back, back to the nose, back days old of nose days gold."
"twas toes woes that told the shoes to take their foes and wink with night the days bright."
"Pass thus nightly gone wish that i may see beyond the caraboo tree?"
"old seeds, old seeds, old seeds" said the beard, all along unsure of his own fate.

Two nights later as old man sat in the moon's shade he said to the beard.
"never too late to begin with the creeping lorse?"
"nor is the night right for such a plaguish feind!"
"sorry" said old man, in his old and frail voice, twas soon he would suffer and die.

During hsi sleep old man was restless, his dreams more horrifying than ever, he lay feeling like he was in a daycare, with singing children all around. Old man woke up screaming and then coughed up some blood.

Beard was on the meadow during day, old man still asleep, for if he knew beard was converging with the day meadow, he would cease upheaval of the grand hrofmulf and the moon would crash into the great sea.

Old man sat on the moonlit tree of caraboo, unkowing of where his beard had gone, he cried many nights worth and sat, holding up the Hrofmulf with his soy energies. Old man sat and cried until he heard the sun rising, tonight he would stand against it.

Old man charged up the energies of soy that remained in his old and saggy flesh, he sent a powerful bolt at the rising sun as a word of warning. Suddenly old man spotted Old beard on the rise, he cried out "Run beard, for the light is on your caboose!"

Beard sent out corrupted finches at the old man, old man realised his folly and returned fire with many blasts of soy. Beard summoned a sun circle of energy around himself and corrupted finches continuously flew out of his beard- body.

Old man created a lorse - wall to protect him from the finches, but it would not hold. Old man summoned allof his energy into one powerful attack.

Old beard sensed the great energy coming from behind the lorse wall and turned to run, but the energy was drawing him in.

Old man sprouted soy stalks and jumped to his escape, while old beard was drawn into the soy vortex, to be consumed forever, but as beard closed in on the vortex, old man too was drawn in. Old beard had called on the ancient ties between old man and the beard to when he was merely a baby, and old man's old father seperated the long old beard from his baby face.

Old man fell off his stalk towards the hole, but as he fell he summoned the giant finch of Nasgarth to his rescue, the finch swooped in and caught old man, and took him to the plateau of soy, where beans and finches roamed freely.

Old beard, was never seen again...

2008-03-01T21:53:00.000-08:00

They say that you can hear the plants and trees grow here in the summer. =) Wouldn't be a surprise really, the way they have to race from spring to authumm. I like plants. ^-^ Specially forests are always very nice here, smell of wet earth, trees and turpentine. Trees are awesome. XD

IMPORTANT NEWS

2008-03-01T04:28:00.001-08:00

looks like soy has once again gained dominance over soy17 in the blogs amazing poll, cheers me harteys and keep voting for soy, because number one is always better than number 17 ;D.

2008-02-21T07:17:00.001-08:00

Result Quiz
How Evil Are You?

You are more EVIL than 87% of Facebook!

You have your dark-side. On the outside, a pleasant and even comforting demeanor give way to an ocean of dark and tempestuous thoughts. When your thoughts become reality is when the nightmares within finally get a chance to breathe. Beware of your dark side, for although it makes you a complex individual, it adds temptation that will occasionally win the day. Those days will be filled blood.

I'm not evil ='0..

2008-02-02T14:50:00.000-08:00

>__< sry never had a blog and not realy sure what to put in it and i dont know who reads this blogg (right now kind of asuming that no one does? x__x) and im not good at writing anything really so youll have to bear with it xD and tove told me to save old bloggs and be woed over reading them in the future @_@ ehm..

2008-01-27T12:16:00.000-08:00

I just remembered that if i was less human/non-human humans would probably use me to make stuff or eat me. I don't know

2008-01-27T11:17:00.000-08:00

Anybody there?..

2008-01-20T10:20:00.000-08:00

How can I change what's written under Roger like at the bottom of this page? =/

2008-01-16T01:29:00.000-08:00

You can't fulfill a promise for something non-material if you don't have enough material.. I talk too much

2008-01-16T01:24:00.000-08:00

Material costs. Material kinda sucks. My body is material and human and if i was less quantity of material and not human you would be able to stick me in a jar or box and send me anywhere and there would be less worries of money. Money is stupid. I complain a lot. I am material.

2007-12-28T06:34:00.000-08:00

Why would you offer a lamb? Why wouldn't the stupid people just offer themselves? As if majority of humans are worth more than an animal.

Turtles on a log

2007-12-19T05:46:00.000-08:00

the turtles sat on the log
there was a small turtle
there was a big turtle
the turtles had shells that were green

the sand was all yellow
and the turtles did not like it
the turtles like the log
yes they do

mr nose had no hose
so he baked a pair of shoes
but where to find
an old wind chime

no to the nose
no to the hose
no to the shows
but yes to soy

no to the nose
no to the hose
no to the shows
but yes to soy

oh glorious day
spread your seed
on my nose
all day long

i am of nose and
frost
on the carbon walls of noose

2007-11-12T09:19:00.000-08:00

Today pucas found an empty tome, he decided he would fill it with all of his knowledge
pucas decided he would put his spells, stories and sand memoirs into it.
the tome would be called The Grand tome of Knowledge

all forms of magical energies would swallow the tome and turn it into a magical leaflet of amazment.

"Every day one can find a new bit of knowledge in the book" said pucas himself

"it shall break boundaries and push the world into a new era" said an old man.

three servants would climb to the top of a giant nose and discovere the filled tome, there they would become one and swallow three small children, respectively.

no crab had ever felt that way before, and nor did they expect it to.

Crunch Time

2007-11-11T13:16:00.000-08:00

Belaido! Come forth for the CRAB WISHES TO STROKE YOU
splendid
WHAT!?
Nothing sir, merely a quandry of the birds to the oakenhaven dusselCROFT
geeehhhhhhhhhhh *FROWNS* you make me sad, and bitter, and chilly in the legs.
You poor little seed, does one need a sprinkle?
Dont tell me youre into sexual pleasures by Urination on someone
No, of course not, how could I be.... my love is for the Crab nothing more
That is good :P
:)

The Sound of Music

2007-11-11T13:08:00.000-08:00

The Norwegian Forests are alive with the sound of music
With songs of Satan they have sung for a thousand years
The Forests fill my inner darkness with the sound of music
My soul wants to scream every song it hears

My heart wants to beat like the wings of the crows
that rise from the Lake Bodom to the Oaks
My heart wants to sigh like a fetus that dies
from a church after a burning
To laugh like a Christian when it trips and falls over onto a pike set up by someone cool
stones on its way to the Dao Land
To scream through the night like a cunt who is learning to pray like a Christian fag

I go to the Norwegian Forests when my heart is lonely
I know I will hear what I've heard before
My heart will be tainted once more with the sound of music
And I'll scream once more

the soon rising crab

2007-11-07T00:27:00.000-08:00

the crab rises, over the moon and toward the cows. this pantiful clothes basket was not too wary to be uncalled for but for those who never quite understood it was a savvy soup. soup of course being it's favourite flavour for when selecting the lovable lollypop. any soup really, red, green, black, yellow, golden garnish color with black speckles. all soup is amazing to the soon rising crab.
in times a new, with tomes of golden milk, the soon rising crab was unable to seed the sand. the sand of course needed to be seeded, but this was impossible when the crab would not eat his soup. noone really knows why the crab would not taste his soup, as he had loved it vigorously before. the crab simply said "no soup for me, a crab dont eat this soup". the crab had matured into an old man. he enjoyed old big chairs of leather, and women wearing large hat arrangments, with plumes on the sides.
no crab left to be found to seed sand, as none like soup, all are old men, of various styles and sags. there was one crab though, who was older than the rest, or wiser, or not at all either. this crab's name was crab. Crab was the alpha male crab, he was the best hunter, and the best at chess. none of the other crabs even stood a chance against him. Crab was a crab from the south asodean sea, there he had lived in a large clam, as most crabs do from birth, and ate his way out from the inside.
Strangely enough this Clam was larger than the average and Crab became exceedingly large for a crab. this was of course strange and noone knew why. but now that Crab was so big he could dress up as a Plank and do the happy milk man dance.

of course this story is true, why do people always ask me about my blogs. "pucas, this storys is so amazing," they say "it has moved my heart miles, but is it really true"
why would i ever lie about something, the haggard nose, the soy feinds, the lorses, all of it true, all of them my adventures. you fools know nothing of our world if you havent danced on the lorse garden, if you havent fought, side by side, with the soy mineral machine thigns. if you havent drank the purest of soy, with the freshest of soy bagels.

without these things my life would be dull and boring, of a school day child. BUT ALAS I AM NOT, I AM THE GREAT CARPENT GREENWARD, MASTER OF THE SOY AND THE FINCHES.

the haggard nose

2007-11-06T07:13:00.000-08:00

the haggard nose
oh how i do dream of thee
on a breezy summers eve
or on the night of the carnival

you came to me first
a package
of silver foil
and red glittering tinsel

i opened thee with the slightest movements
increments with calculated magnitude speed and time
fragments of a complete movement which was altogther the act of opening
revealing and embelleshing you my lovely nose

frank's puppets are not of the highest quality this year
in previous times past his puppets have served to me
powerful tools of indication
recreation, enjoyment

but during lifetimes all is consumed
the haggard nose oh how he devours
time immortal or irreversible
not both nor either the nose is ravenous

endless hunger
it pushes on even after the nose
for those unconsumed
will harness the power of the nose

and take upon themselves the strength and hunger felt once by this nose oh haggard

the crayfish do say so it is the end
of those unendable
of gods and humanity alike

a harsh and brutal winter approaches
and the dark, cold clouds of night draw near
to be lost in this madness is putrid
to be lost in this place is madness
and to be forever wanting, wanting more and more
is putrid like this place of madness

~CARPET OF FLAMES~

2007-10-23T04:08:00.000-07:00

Basil put down the stove
Fuck You
Im warning you Basil, Ill fucking chop you
Do it
What?
I SAID - DO IT
Excuse me drain
That makes no sens
I know, its an anagram for would you like to go to bed with me
Oh
Well?
Well what
Do you want to?
Do what
Go to bed with me
Hmmmm I dunno.... let me check my oak
Fine
Well it says I may in exactly 2.5 mintues aslong as I deliver all the Huckleberries to the Havery by next week
You hafnt much time
Nay, I do not
I was rather looking forward to basking in the hills
Well you can throw that fucking dream away
That was harsh, very harsh
Im sorry
I dont know If I can believe that
Why not
You have a dog in your leg
How can you tell
IT FUCKING BIT ME
*Shoots*
*Dies*
Muahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Sand woes, oh my sand woes

2007-10-16T16:39:00.000-07:00

Herald of nightly
carpet of fame,
silk on the bently
oh what a shame

fallen to herbfinch
the berries do fall
like night on a sunset
up down from they crawl

finch lost in the woods
does hear of his name
three times do they call
but he plays not their game

fly finch, fly for your soy
don't let the crab
eat crab no crab hand?
yes to the crab run like a crab

run from the milkman
run from the sun
run from the children
run from the goose

soy and sand close to make
no sand woes
but sand woes arose
though the presence of soy and sand
were not without life

but oh to my sand woes
i do this disclose
woes from sand, woes to and woes about
not to you but from you i beleive
these words do beseech me
and i give them my leave

sand woes, oh my sand woes
to the end your size grows
but so does the clam
clam of larger nose

and i with no habit
claim to my queen
eat some beans my lady
sand woes oh, a woes from the sand i found

heed this only one and finch of clay
one word means a million
and a million mean nothing
but without a million words
one word cannot be found
and without that one word no meaning shows

sand woes, to me do you come
with friends in new clothes
oh woes sand of woes i see
woes woes woes
but without me you are nothing
to clam to post to sink to shop

cradel your little bubby child
let them fall
and make a big hole in their head on a loose floorboard
do you find sand woes?
the answer always goes
by the sound of noes

you find your woes for another
woes old plain woes
woes old woes of the plane i do not feel
feel your woes of planes i do not
for i am not plane i am but a nose
and so my sand brings my woes

aha again fine herald what
brings you to elsinore?
to my mothers funeral and my fathers wedding to my uncle doth say hamlet
clamlet
clamlet do he say without meaning or to fortuitous finch
"salmon"

no, he says that no, he says
i the nobel clamlet find no finch in your hidden chest of herbs
and the man says with returning glee
"yes"

sand woes why follow you my nose
i ask only for clothes, sound and a hose
but you always grasp at my lower belongings,
you claim i am your woes
so you must be mine

not that my nose did anything wrong in the first place.

Death to Harugurarraway

2007-10-15T11:42:00.000-07:00

On this night falls the one and only seed breather, he calls himself Harugurarraway. Haru for short, brought upon this world the white light that infects every corner of the planet, of the universe. Haru was sent to this world by unkown winds of happiness, a true bleeding moss cum.
The world was full of darkness, and night beasts. Haru defeated this planet, with his shining bright light, he blinded the holy creatures, and burnt them to crisps. Haru felt no remorse for the beasts, he spread lies and created humanity. Humanity, bent to self destruct from its own weak mastery of this light.
Out of these humans born was the dark demon, he held only darkness in his tarnished hands. His name was Gnuter. Gnuter followed the ways of the old beasts of night. Gnuter felt no love for the despicable race that created him, and wished only for their death. Gnuter felt that he needed to desecrate the light that he was surrounded in.
Haru sat on a podium of stone and watched over his doll house of a world, reminiscing in his own glory. Gnuter searched for Haru all his life, but he failed, miserably. Gnuter was once poisoned by a christian, and hidden in the lost cave of Hmnethclaw. Gnuter spent the last days of his life, tunneling out of the sealed Hmnethclaw, to find himself in a bountiful padge of soy. There he died happy.

Send Graft to 112 Pickle Lane.

2007-10-14T05:47:00.000-07:00

of course some walk with trees.
amongst the leaves.
looking to the sky you will never notice the dying child.

Herb

2007-10-11T15:58:00.000-07:00

O' gerbum go harbum
herbum go thrice
left i in a field with common house mice
three noses of the carrawoo tree
nice tripe to severed finch be

o' call the noses
o' call the noses
o' call the noses thrice
and with gernheby they clash

elderly finch
do swander with glee
forty pounds of flesh
for seven krowns three

o' sand finch, sand nose or nose not sand
call one crab to the eastern pagan
cough without mourning
clap with no pollen
seed of the elder

elder's seed does it shine
with glistening glory it do
do it that with no other crab supporting?
of course said the persecuted jew

oh but so it wanes
wanes doth it
crab o navel exclusive of clam

2007-10-11T06:10:00.000-07:00

Before me stood the man. I could not see his face, the hood on his black robe concealed his face completely. He lifted his arm, revealing a long pale bony hand, and he beckoned me too him. I looked up at raven perched on my shoulder, he stood there silently watching him. Cameron obviously did not trust this man, yet i trusted him completely. The man gestured again for me to come forward, and i did walk up to him. The stench of rotting flesh washed over me, and i felt a strong longing to make love to him. His arm reached up and he touched upon my nose with the tip of his finger, gently caressing it before his arm moved down my face, down through my long beard and onto my chest, and then on to my stomach where he placed his hand flat. Suddenly he plunged his hand into my flesh. Blood dripped onto the cold snow at my feet, and i laughed as i felt his hand move through my body, touching upon each of my organs. Cameron let out a fierce cry, yet stood there and continued to watch. He took out his hand, and held it up to my mouth, letting me lick it clean. Weakness overcame me and i fell to my knees in the snow. It was so cold all of a sudden. I took Cameron in my hands, and inserted him into the gaping wound in my stomach, thinking at the time it is the right thing to do. I looked up at where the friendly stranger was, only to find he was not there anymore, only an old, frail man, wearing nothing at all, letting me look upon his warm looking, saggy genitals. He looked into my eyes, then stared up at the night sky. Before me he lifted into sky, moving upwards slowly until i could no longer see him. I laughed as i fell face forward into the bloodstained snow before me, and I continued to laugh out loud until i was too weak to use my voice. I closed my eyes, and let the cold wash over my body. As i lay there, feeling my mind disappearing, i thought to myself what a good day it had been.

Eager Cashew

2007-10-09T14:32:00.000-07:00

Eager chasew was a bright young fellow, he played tennis and had two brothers.
His brothers were named Ortun and Milk
Milk was tall and Ortun was short.

Fan o beretweeth, clad in a full grown beeth
cran of nan with blended finch of my old twined greatberry
sand of my soy, clambered to the nose, i am not in a blog writing mood
so i will instead
not write one
but write labels instead

Obel Qarn

2007-10-08T14:50:00.000-07:00

obel qarn was the third old man to eat a clay burd for his second arrival. on the third day of nose gathering he sat on his clam and traveled towards the toe realm of nosepoth. a three time walk toward the garden feeth. eager finches await the steps of a humble passanger.

ober twither
warn o meek
calm the napes on turburques cheek
swelter melt scrape and scream

cast catch bite and rape
living my only dream
eaten soul darkened eyes
sand on the bow of my ship

elephant singing to his song
without these

helm upon head
gloves on hand
shoe on foot
sword slung over the shoulder

stand in the icy wind
walk the cold and dark path
leave all behind
with nothing to find

follow or lead
pursue or stand motionless
all have no name
all come without bearing

heed harbour 04 with
without the crab
without the soy
without the milk
without the nose
without the finch
without the life

The soy and the seven sags

2007-10-07T14:55:00.000-07:00

There once was a soy with seven old sags
herro hurrum bellow bags
never notice contump glands
sweltered cheap china nose from hands

aha cried cramp cumpet
suckle from one others nose?
trice came the beets with no hollow
shoe crows

seven dastardly sags
doth twiddle doth they shine
sand sand sand sand crab milk nose hay brine
sheep or goat
i cannot decide
through my own devices i divide
and compute to a three
on which i balance
a man and a tree
both come to be even

seven weeks of crayon smelting and my days were numbered, how long could i keep work here, undercover without the master noticing i was gone?
seven weeks at the handle of a smelter, without notice? it was all too gay for me to beleive. The master was scrupulous and unforgiving, if he were to discover that i was away. He would surely be taking my hands... no my feet
or one foot and one hand, best not think on it. he would already be angered if i returned, all i could do now was wait to see what would happen. Just like i thought several burds of soy sprouted from the walls and created one large lorse. I sat calmly, turning my smelter, with only short glances at the lorse. I knew it was watching me, i could see its beady finch eyes staring right through my bowler hat.
"Cray crellum bogerheeth!" i screeched at the hovering lorse.
It turned sharply, resolute and precise.
"Hee heezum, mohagblargh hen doyos?" it's thunderous voice pronounced.
"Geebe geebum garbo gelk" was my own little reply.
"Ectum ey bero el seldo hanada!"
He was surely most pleased.
With his last seliloquay the giant lorse tangled its burds close in time for a tale, of crayon smelter to lorse from the base of my heart. But i could not tell my tale for seven large ogres broke into the crayon factory that day, the Lorse quickly tassled me in his burds and we made a hasty escape.
For seven years have i traveled in the burds of this giant lorse, we exchange memories, thoughts and our predictions of coming events. Sometimes we return to the destroyed remains of the crayon factory, and reminisce in the sunlight.
I am a lucky soul, for on the day the ogres attacked, my old master came to find me in the abandoned factory. He must have known somehow i was hiding there, maybe it was the note i left him, or just his sense of the grander finch.
In any case my master was forced to flee the battle, no Hated-finch can take on a group of ogres, you see my master was a finch as well, but not one of grand divinity. He was the hated finch, finch that was hated. He listened to mainstream music and at fish. No other finch liked him, no animal liked him, only ottersly otter. Sometimes on our trips to the destroyed factory, the lorse and i see ottersly crying, and paying his respects. Normally we throw cheese and cabbage at the sly old rooster, but sometimes we leave him cry. For no otter deserves such teasing on every occasion, not even ottersly.
Twas this tuesday that the giant lorse and i travelled to the moon, we stayed some weeks, and left before the sunday evening, so as to return home before the week began. The lorse swallowed the mayor of sandburg, though he is still alive, they created a grave for him. I was most uninformed and missed the ceremony, and now am on the run from the Herrowdao police. Luckily for me, no vehicle can match the speed that is a giant lorse, and in any case i am safe from harm.

2007-10-04T21:19:00.000-07:00

I cradled a child in my arms once, he bore the mark of a true warrior on his face. A sign from the gods, surely i thought as i ran my hand over the boys supple frame. I held his soft genitals in my hand, cradling them like a cup. I ran my hands over them, inspecting every detail. He looked up at me, with his large sad eyes. I looked at my friend, a crow named Cameron, perched on my shoulder. He let out a restless cry and flapped his wings twice. No, he was no good too me i decided. I carefully placed his body on the ground, and swiftly stomped on his neck. A large cracking noise sounded through the forest and the boy stopped moving, lying there staring into nothingness. I stood there a moment, enjoying the beautiful scene before me, before pulling out my knife and kneeling next to the boy. I cut open his torso and began searching through the organs for what i wanted. Eventually i happened across the rectum, and after severing it from the rest of the intestines i placed it in a satchel around my neck. I cut off his testicles, and popped one of them into my mouth and crushed it with my teeth, squirting its delicious juices everywhere. A treat for the road i told myself as a pocketed the other one. I wiped the wet mess from my long beard with a linen cloth, and began to head down the forest trail with a sense of disappointment.

Bowels of the Absurd

2007-10-03T05:08:00.000-07:00

I could feel it beneath my skin.
Wretching at my internal organs.
Writhing.
Tearing.
I cringed and keel over.
Screaming.
What could of become of this?
Was it drugs?
Alchohol?
Pregnancy?
Was it merely period pains?
Bleeding?
Eternal struggle within the reproduction system within a female humanoid.
But, no.
Nothing could explain what was happening to me.
No one could be told.
No one would be able to comprehend such an occurence.
The possibilty was absurd.
Yet.
It continues.
Within this fleshy prison of my very soul rests a presence undeserving of such a kingdom.
It cannot be treated.
Killed.
Or removed.
The state is irreversible.
Forever shall it torment me.
Forever shall it remain.
Forever shall it become apart of me.
Forever together.
Perhaps I may learn to, love it.
Adore it.
Care for it.
For how could one not love such a thing.
Something so beautiful.
One could not be unfaithful.
This secret will be my own.
No one neednt know.
It will be mine.
No one elses.
For I shall bear this.
Within me.
Freely.
But just this once.
I shall mumble the words of my inner cage.
The situation of my bowels.
The zoo of my womb.
Listen.
Listen carefully.
Listen, as I shall not utter it again.
I have crabs in my Vagina.

crabs in my vagina

2007-10-02T07:01:00.001-07:00

Sand woes, oh my sand woes

2007-10-02T06:24:00.000-07:00

oh grand bellows of sand shells
a swooned prince doth lighten
the name of the beast calmed
and four hens on strand

dandy clams on my nose
hellfiends rising around my hose
hose hose hose
rhyme with nose
poem is gay

now shall the tale begin, of hate and virtue
a tale of old, for children and elders
a crab on a plank or a snail in the gutter
all must hear the tale
the tale of bergen seed

bergen seed, a wonderous clam
followed up the mountain great a high goats peek
polished heaps crammed with ghost milk nose
shaven babies torso, skin falling bristly columned sheets
seed walked slowly, to his friend must he meet
oh forrow, fallow mellow shapes
organ donors, often unwilling shall spare me their horrors, for i am a hungry beast
require nourishment much says the soy on my tongue
sheep calm on the mountain, the goat peek doth calm those with feeble noise
though seed was not of the noise feeble he came not calm but frenzied for blood
a sand peek followed
then a grass
then two moons
three no two...
a dog is not enough for the heeped up cartridge thought the columns for it will they suffice
but to never the end will a man follow his dream
seed was not a man, as i have previously claimed, of clam heritage come he
and so followed this dream he fought
and without supplement he urged forward
onsluaght, bring on the onslaught
though it never came
came not it did with gushing flows

my nose is feeble
soon on this peak did arise in seed the woes of sand
sand woes
sand woes he exclaimed, oh my sand woes
to farrow not nose they come these woes
sand woes of the sand
yes his woes came
but he was fatigued by the event
odds and evens were his game, as he played he would sit at the table
stir his stew
swallow bread with labour
uncanny finches fight for their lives
and the crab was once again dead
and there joined he the cat
and the lizard as they lay dieying
in their pit of sorry
all was lost
though what they seeked had been found

2007-10-01T23:27:00.000-07:00

I regret i am the one to inform you, but this must be told. I remember a time, when the various budding craftsmen were brought among the crows of Yeastwood, and they were given a vest of much importance. For this vest bore the crest of a young mage, newly formed from the pit of Lark. It contained a long forgotten magic, used by the warriors of Seth many generations ago, and its powers were far from comprehension. The crows were unsatisfied with this gift, they had not suitable bodies to wield the vest, so it was given as a gift too very old man, a very great friend of mine. The trolls of Fangor where very unpleased with this decision, they knew the old man would wield it against them in battle. They snuck into his realm at midnight, and beat him and his family to death with crab nets, took the vest and left. But they did not know, they did not know i was there. I hid myself, and watched on in awe. I did not feel remorse, nor did i weep at all, for it was a good death. After gathering all his internal organs I found my way to the great Court of Lanferd and described to them what i saw. It was a great law they had broken, so they summoned an army of lizards to steal the limbs of every child, and too take back the vest. They gave it onto me to look after, and since then i have kept it in a very special place.

It was a very sexual experiance

sand on the fields

2007-10-01T15:10:00.000-07:00

i drove a nose across his toes, to ballen weeds and ghacker
i sank a ship to be my lip on salmons bantering cracker
the old man sighed to the cranberry pie and called it a bloody wanker
pigs and pans will sound the hams but not the old man feeble
to see but not a furrowed brow may column upon your keeper
sand to the east
not to the north
i felt loss of my navel
a hand of burgundy wire made scratches deep below my flesh to hardened bones and harrowed

chins...

Dirt 1

2007-10-01T15:05:00.000-07:00

The Old man trotted up the hill towards his olden Mill that he had crafted many a year ago. Inside he had an all sort of nuts and grains and other farm treats. He smiled as all products of his years loin and crab working were present and budded. Jakery, his work horse told him that they simply must head into town to visit the Orphans. "YES! OF COURSE JAKERY!" the Old Man cried aloud "the children will simply enjoy these fresh nuts and seeds!" He fetched his pummeling wood and his sack of lobsters, crabs werent in hatching season so their crustacean brothers would have to suffice for this adventure.

a gift

2007-10-01T08:34:00.000-07:00

Colonies

2007-09-30T05:01:00.000-07:00

the children were basking in the moonlight as they did of every huckleberry harvest
but alas, great bread watched in awe

war was coming.

Sand crate

2007-09-30T04:45:00.000-07:00

the man of the moon left his sand crate on my balcony one eve
i left it there for a day or two, but after a short time i was quite intrigued by it.
i urged towards it, though it shied away
i clambered on its tassles, ha!, i claimed and sank away
shinkle shangle on my meat, cranberry soda, horribly sweet
aha i shouted and it said again
my penny is worth more than thine golden henn
fuck, a two shoed pincher
finch on glass
not on my nose
but no with a farsch
crabs?
in my vagina he claimed
ah so now i see
not with those eyes
crabs in my vagina, they cause me some pain
glass housed finches with nowhere to fly
sand horrors jumping, from bottom to sky

Horacios nostalago

2007-09-27T12:03:00.000-07:00

Samward beetroot and his burnt for-feethster had no orange rupes and so claimed the rock of sundown their nose. A hand of bathory with fire for sand had not worried a camp master on his duty, though the settles were restless. Never low the sun of day, ate kork milk a giant finch. Korben, the lone scarab rider fell to the sand off his valiant steed and cursed at his beets. Roger, the almighty sandpit warrior fought away the herraghy blues with her old finch shoes. Pucas above all, sat on a rock and counted the waves, as in sand has a man not much more to do.

Halo 3

2007-09-26T15:35:00.000-07:00

A tale of Hardship....
A tale of Loss....
A tale of somewhat....
Sand Woes....

I rode my grand-a-beeg across the dunes until I finally reached EB, the video game store I had been seeking. My goal was to reach it by midnight to partake in the launch of the final chapter in the Halo Trilogy.

I entered into the crowd, Halo fans from across the entire galaxy had assembled to witness the spectacle. There was much excitement as all the geeks began to fester on their skin and holes appeared with boils and blood seeping from all gashes and some writing tentacles lashed out within them.

There was a roar as the copies of the game were brought forward, the geeks all began a chant and banged battle drums and began taking all their clothes off and some were beginning to run against one another which created electrical sparks. The atmosphere was electric, but then out of nowhere, A GRAND SAND SCARAB BEETLE ERUPTED FROM THE SANDS! "LOOK!" cried one of the geeks "its a scarab from Halo 2!" The grand sand scarab lashed out its spined tongue and imapled him then slid him within its slimey jaws and smiled.

The Grand Sand Scarab feasted upon all of those at the Halo 3 Launch, except for me. But alas my torture and suffering was far greater, for the next millenia I was sentenced to ride the Grand Sand Scarab Beetle. Through the abyss's of time we would ride, into the fires and into the stars. Forever.

Sand woes, oh my sand woes

2007-09-26T13:40:00.000-07:00

sand woes, oh my sand woes
hermond beeth of the gardened nose
sand woes of hardened toes
feet of open socks, do nigh but shows

hollow rows of belt makers foes
sand woes, oh my sand flows
sand hoes, sand woes of the nose
fur coat nose, oh my sand grows

oh sand sand, sand sand
ahoy my sand , oh sorrowful glows
harrowed old nose, fathomed mans clothes
the shop comes to close and the ladies bent nose

ahargh my hent bleedfinth
a shandy of mushrooms and shoes
sand woes, oh my sand woes
borrow from me, naught only beastial wonderings

gerkhin jerkhin, followed groves
harrowed rose, banded clothes
sanded shores on the beaches resumé
a handled finch never does but sigh to the sun

horumund money-maker
sent from the gallows
fought night till midnight
and lost his shoes
oh sand, sand woes of mine

to the mournful gleem,
a lost rope of knots.
tie them my friends
or fall to the omen

handled by the master
the finch sighs to the sun
and claims with a sigh,
oh my sand woes

woes of the sand i bid thee
my nose
and harp of well-meaning
oh my sand woes

sharp salute
sand harrows clothes
borrowed from those who give not
a sorrowful crow
oh my woes

sand oh my sand
woes oh my woes
far from the end
but not the beginning

oh my woes of sand why speeketh
thee on this night a garland of noses
and three decibled clams
winches on taps without
claim to the butterman

sink on my toes
oh my lost sand woes
lost in my mind
but slowly arose

to my mind came the woes
of sand and the nose
but call of the nose not my woes
oh but just sand woes
sand woes, oh my sand woes

Green handed

2007-09-23T14:16:00.000-07:00

Soup lorseington was a grand old bank. He held four fathoms with his Gallaheen Foosth. Of course this was not the column of gardenbeehb that fortified the shilker. Jerubeen Jerubeen, where have you been, i saw your Hose but not your Keen. Shining Hoofs of Bernard man's horse, you have no idea how to contort my lorse, though harrows be nigh and a roost cocks his crow. Four marching moon gurds watch from below. I sway with my cattle-stamp and four long green hands, i march up the broken ward to my new found finch. Cecilia claims she isnt asian but i know she is, the lying finch. i found her quandry on the fourth bellow, though she knows not my pallot she sees through the hand of meegrah, green though it is, i caught her lying red handed, even though the name be green.

How it is.

2007-09-13T02:38:00.000-07:00

~everything is shit~

The End.

Zelble leblebleble

2007-09-12T11:35:00.000-07:00

A giant foozth once claimed upon me, "Zelble leblebleble" unto his knowledge i forsooth my name, seven carnigals and four wishgrancks.
Accordian player of marrowfinths dao. Ho humble my guardian, ho humble thy crown. A mantoothed bean salad with four speckled dicks. my humble nose guardian ho sheffle doth flicks.
Do sweep my garden of napes. Agar agar of carved helum shades. oh soy of the fountain i beckon doth yourn. Clams of feeble forresters sand yarned to sweet. Beckon forth the axe weilding man. O carnegey harrum seedwitch, your end is at hand. Execution for those who force against slander, with milk and heefs on geerubs.

Sand woes, oh my sand woes

2007-09-09T05:46:00.000-07:00

Bernard Hose, with my sand woes. Grabbed by the nose, torn from his clothes. Ignorance shows, it shines and glows. Men march in rows, their ignorance grows.
Alvan Amarum said to my beeth, "go helegeed, go helegeed go helegeedgeeth."
"oh twas to my second, of narvumni nighth a chance may it be,"
"go helegeed"
", that stumble upon i may, a sharpened saw of seeth,"
"go helegeed"
", a tram of good fortune, with no harrowed beeds?"
"go helegeedgeeth"
"twas fortune of course that bound fates of ours to trees"
"helegeedgeeth"
Twas on that night might i add, Alvan Amarum failed to corrupt the sand of Cedrick Bo Hamew, which to his own falling was not on the clams, but moved to the forage of Carbenby Gordon.

Star Wars: The Untold Story: Episode I

2007-09-09T05:32:00.000-07:00

Darth Vader stood aloft a large sand beast and beckoned forth Crab Soldiers to engage the Rebels hiding under some beaver skins. Crab Soldiers had come into serve the Empire over the shitty Stormtroopers as they had crappy plastic armour and could be raped by several Ewoks.

Brak-Lork a Tusken Raider watched the spectacle of the Imperials battling the Rebels across the sand dunes, not just any mere sand dunes, HIS SAND DUNES, sacred site of the sand people where they would gather sand for festivals of dance and singing. He held high his gaffi stick and cried a howl for Tusken reinforcements, and as Old Ben Kenobi would say; theyll be back, and in greater numbers too.

Pucas is ~~~

2007-08-24T09:24:00.000-07:00

The Part of You That No One Sees

You are aloof, mysterious, and distant.
People feel like they really don't know the true you...
Yet they're still drawn to you, almost by magnetic force.

Underneath it all, you don't even really feel like you know yourself.
It's easier to put on a front than really think about your life's purpose.
You tend to seem pretentious, but it's just a mechanism you use to push people away.

What's the Part of You That No One Sees?

Harrod Gazaneab and the nose marchers

2007-08-23T03:10:00.000-07:00

the old man sitting, sitting on the floor
the news boy running, running to the door
the grand nose marching, marching to the war
the sad child walking, walking as a chore
the angered finch swearing, swearing at the whore
the dieying crow crowing, a sharp and rasping craw

the churned up guts are splattered, on the party floor, our nose is bloody the finch is muddy and the garnish reminds of gore. the soy plays on its trumpet flute, a song of fancy four, in the silent murky mist the old man is no more.

angered lorses, lost their berds,
gone to the chapel feast
lit fire to the herds
eating up the mans old tail, a sand of clammy hairs

happy go lucky salmon brook, chopping on his loaf. began to sing he did, to the old carron bead.
the bead of course replied not, as a carron bead does. and Salmon sat, to observe his quiet carron feind below. "why speaketh you not, foul window of feeth."
"carron, carron, carron bead beeth."
"now speaketh you crazed, and unfathomed words."
"doth hoisten me up, i hunger for burds."
"sand widdows of Gazaneab, you poor muddled fool."
"doth hoisten me up, i hunger for burds."

Bernard Finch and his Trembling Nose

2007-08-19T13:47:00.000-07:00

Bernard was young once, and claimed many the garden beeth. But now he is old, and has no teeth. The sand of his waters wades with time, and the clock of life has thus struck nine.
"tis gettin' late on the lonely waters" wandered him to his self "they aught to rechurn some tassles, of garrenshires qually"
"the sand is creepying "cried the unsustained nose, whose feet did seem to tremble.
"tis always assumptions, and never rebutes," Bernard claimed "your shawing is weaker than the rest of the garden!"
the nose doth tremble at this moment
"now i shall slay you foul beast!"
Bernard has thus sent his foot towards the nose and sent it to the padges of soy.
"i merely claimed the sand of north cometh east to the beards, you see not the fathoms in which i pierce!"
but bernard would not listen
"you question my authority to holster the birds, my little nose your curry was stirred!"
"stirred may it be, it taste of tree"
"and tree shall you have, at such a late time, a food from another would make you far too active"
and so they slept in the late of the night, though they did not realise their true song had in fact returned the sand to its place of rest, and they were stuck on the island again in their sleep, to wake again and the nose to tremble and bernard to anger. finches are cool

The sand warriors of Bel-Seledas [Chapter 3]

2007-08-17T04:46:00.000-07:00

It was a cold night in Bel-Seledas, but the gate watcher sat, enflamed, but calm. The night never brought war, not since the apes took to the sky. He stood with his spear of granite in hand. He saw a glint in the distance, blinked his dark eyes once and saw it approach at terrifying speed. He rang the warning bell and prepared his spear for a battle. What was this approaching, a new weapon of the humans? Soon he saw what it was as it approached. Several Fire demons, flying towards him. He lowered his spear but did not change stance, no fire demon could take to the air like this.
The low churn of the propellor hadalmost lulled Desmond into sleep, when he heard loud cries in the pit, something out of the ordinary had happened, which was unusual. For years there had been a rigid and stale peace between the humans and the Fire demons. Desmond replaced his nightcap with the hardened cap of Tortuk, a symbol of low rank in the HAC, Human Armed Corps. He ran down to the pit to report to the senior officer, and question what had happened.
"several targets spotted, moving quickly through the air,"
"what?"
"the demons have wings, and are now taking to the sky."
"where are they now?"
"i dont know but they seem to have not noticed us, arm the cannons and prepare for battle, we must return to the Wind Master at once to report this."
Desmond moved to the cannon room and began to load and cock the cannons, as he worked he began to wonder, he had never faced battle before, and the demons were disgusting abominations to be feared. What would happen if the humans final refuge was finally defeated? What would become of his own race?
Bel saladas was groggily awakening from a deep slumber, all but the miners had been sleeping, and the town was confused, the warning bell had been rung but no fight had followed. Soon the gates opened and in flew some tired but strong Fire Demons. The duke came to greet them, to discover it was the team of architects that had set out to find new technology to destroy the enemy. The duke took them in, to his nest and spoke.
In his deep, scratching and old voice the duke spoke,
"what have you discovered in those mountains Balandrao?"
Balandrao stood silent his eyes fixed on the duke, slowly he unfolded his wings, now fully formed and capable of carrying more than 10 Fire demons.
The duke sat, quietly, stewing over the information.
"you mean to tell me the finch of Nardas has invoked you?"
"Aye"
"and how may we give this gift to the other warriors?"
Balandrao took a peice of growing soy from his own body, cracked the burnt outer shell and threw it on the table for the duke. "consume it and he returns to us."
The duke took the sprig and consumed, at first their was only slight difference, his body began to tremble, then suddenly his eyes shot wide open and he growled loudly. His wings shot open at full length. The duke stood there in silence for a few minutes and then said to the architects, "you have completed your quest, and have opened the gates of destruction for the humans,"
the duke folded his wings slowly, ", may their future crumple in the the flames of our fury."
-three weeks later-
Desmond, now captain of his own, fully armed gunship was circling the airspace above the apparent location of Bel - Seledas. His cannoneers, ready for any battle stood ready. Desmond cleaned the rims of his goggles, and fixed his Hardened Captain's Cap. "he turned to the edge of the ship and peered out, he thought to himself "things have been quiet ever since those demon sightings, im beginning to wonder whether the Master is doing the right thing, and whether Captain Gleamus was just seeing things in his tired state. Either way we have orders, questioning them will only get me into trouble." Desmond remained leaning over the bow for a few more moments, but soon straightened, in the distance was a glint of light, of flame. Desmond called to the cannoneers, "Prepare yourselves! Sight on starboard, keep your eyes open!"

The Fire demons had spotted the circling Galleon in their airspace and had decided to try out their new abilities. One demon was sent to the distance, to catch the galleon's attention, once they moved towards it for the kill, the remaining warriors would approach from below and engulf the ship, killing all inside.

Desmond took out his rifle and spyglass, and attached the two. He watched over the demon from his distant spot, it seemed to be spasming. "Get closer to the target!"
Navigator Sewell changed course and headed towards the far away demon. Desmond saw as he got closer not a spasming beast, but a laughing one, it seemed to know he was watching and pointed at him. At first Desmond was confused, but later he realised that it was pointing behind him. Desmond Turned to watch the shit become engulfed in flames, and suddenly all dissapeared, as his head was claimed by one of the Fire Demons.

Below in Bel Seledas, most of the population had their inner finch awakened, the duke stood with his dark staff, on the highest point of the fortress and watched the ship above become destroyed. The duke stood and began to laugh, then cackle.
"Look to the sky my children," he coughed hoarsley ",our first victory against the apes, their fate is sealed!" And with that the duke raised his arms to the sky and summoned a sand pyre, engulfed in flame, to signify the defeat of humanity.

The Fire Demons and the taming of the Mountains within [Chapter 2]

2007-08-17T04:24:00.000-07:00

For a decade some degree of peace between the Humans and the Fire Demons, the next stage of the Sand Warriors. The Humans harvested rare minerals from the clouds in Air farms as the Fire Demons remained anchored to the restrictions of land, primarily their fortress of Bel-Seledas. They were studying the mountains. Although they were made of land materials, they feared the mountains, they revered them as gods. But one day a young Fire Demon named Balandrao son of Grandao decided it was time to act. He led a team of archaeologists to the mountains and began the descent upwards. For Nine Months they explored the mountain range, when they decided to turn back they were approached by an elderly asian man named
Kung-Hwei who lived in a cave. He sat them down around a large fire as they enjoyed a large broth made of salamander leaves and coats of badger aswell as an unknown secret ingredient. The old man smiled to himself and sang a song aloud to his guests;

Ah fickle thee wise men 3
rain on the cereal tender to
the cheeks of a child
for oats and berries do not sway
the land mass of old
or the childrens dismay
a goat so old
does not sleep
but watches the moonlight
his wood rearranged
like clams in a stove
bleating a cry
he dies

The travellers were utterly excited by the rhyme the old man uttered. They came to realise the secret ingredient within the broth was in fact, the plant of the ancients; Soy. With this coming realisation they became more then what they were, they had been blessed with the Finch within each one of them.
'Alas!' Balandrao exclaimed
'I have felt the finch within me all my life, now with with this knowledge hatched we can take the fight against the Wind Master and the Humans by building Wind craft of our own.'
'Yes' replied Jarktoff
As they flew back to Bel-Seledas to introduce Soy to its citizens the old man stood in his doorway with a glow in his eye, he laughed to himself with a smile and raised a glass of his own breast milk to his pursed lips and drank. Then rhymed to himself;

Be not a crab
but the lobster of old
the finches of farthington
have no reason to gloat
there feathers red and brown
and tassled with gold
have but no finger
to call their own.

The sand warriors of Bel-Seledas [Chapter 1]

2007-08-17T03:49:00.000-07:00

A thousand and 5 days before the rise of man a horde of Sand Warriors dwelled in the deserts of Arabia. These warriors were not plant mineral or animal, but a mixture of all three. They were manifestations of soy plants, finches and sand. They roamed the sands in pairs or threes hunting for unwary pigs. After years or reign over the world the sand warriors soon had a new foe, humans. The humans had risen out of the sea beginning as small lizards, and had soon become man. The sand warriors disliked the humans and found it impossible to deal with such creatures. Soon a great war began between the races and the humans were on the brink of destruction. The Sand warriors had fought valiantly, and were fewer in number than the humans, though what they lacked in numbers they made up for in skill. The sand warriors had millenia of experience in battle against boars, similar to humans, and could easily defeat the unarmed beasts with their bare tentacles. Until one day the humans began to develop weapons from the trees. They tore down the trees, close relatives to the sand warriors, and turned them into sharpened spoon like spears. The sand warriors found it difficult to attack the humans from such a distance and had to develop weapons of their own. Because of their brute strength the sand warriors hurled large bundles of leaves at the humans, taking them down from extreme distances.

The Humans became afraid of the sand warriors and took to hiding in the trees, and leave the battles to try and develop new weapons to use against the sand warriors. The sand warriors too were awaiting the return of the humans and started creating new weapons to fight against the humans. The humans began to manufacture swords from the wood, without access to the ground they could not claim much metal. They began to fashion armor from their trees, and camouflage from the leaves. The soy warriors began to train large beasts, and summon sand-monsters from their deserts. Humans, without much power to use the arcane, failed to strike bck at the sand warriors, and many times were wiped out in large groups by a single sand warrior in control of sand minions.

This was until from the sky above descended a half human-half eagle, he was not known well by the humans except that he could control wind and was more physically powerful than any man. He was named the wind master, the sand warriors however knew him well and had been for many years, mortal enemies with him. The tide of the battle began to turn and the wind master lead the humans into many victorious battles against the scattered sand warriors. The sand warriors retreated back into their fortress in the desert, called Bel-Saladas, and summoned their leader, the giant fire lizard of Napes. The fire lizard was submurged from the depths of the fortress and was informed by the sand warriors of the great battle they faced. The lizard returned to the depths to reappear with an army of fire-minions. The walls of the fortress being harrowed by the humans and their wind-god were soon to be falling, when out of the front soy-gate charged the lizard and his minions, englulfing the humans in flame. The humans fell that day, the remains of the battle a charred earth and smoking corpses. The humans had to retreat and consolidate their god, if they were to destroy these sand warriors and become rulers of the earth. The sand warriors now claiming more of their land, effortlessly from the humans, began to rise in power, merging with the fire minions, into abominations. The sand warriors now called them selves fire demons, and charred the earth with their steps. The humans had grown to fear the sight of them. But the fire demons had opened up a new weakness, water. The humans began to dwell on bodies of water, in boats and large underwater cities. The fire demons finding it hard to attack the humans, even before the fire their sand - bodies made it difficult to move through water. The demons began to use their control of nature over other plants and began to use the trees to either dry out bodies of water or to entangle their roots upon dwellings in the waters. Sinking the humans, who still required oxygen. The humans had no idea how to fight, until they created the blimp. With their wind god, the Humans now ruled the sky, and not even the fire demons could manage to reach them, the time came for another stage of evolution, so the fire demons looked to the mountains.

Its been a while but im back

2007-08-09T11:45:00.000-07:00

ok well heres a few reasons why i havent been posting lately
firstly i fucked up my operating system once, that required reinstallation but i kept my stuff
secondly i install flyff, run, error, manual reset which was accompanied by full hdd wipe
thirdly this is the first day ive actually sat in front of the computerr too bored to do anything else

haha so heres a post
i dunno if i shud just make a story
ok ill just make one since u insist mr clam slapper

one day in Simon Hunterback's berry feild three small gnomes dug their way out of the earth. One gnome was called Ferburt. The gnomes had a small villa in the outer suburbs that they usually lived in, but then they stopped, they decided to live in the ground. In fact it seems to be Ferburt's fault that they have surfaced, it was his turn to dig and drag the cart. Now he has dug into the surface and has emerged into a large field of berries. The other gnomes seem annoyed, awoken from their slumber by fresh air and berries, they turn to Ferburt, "why are we in a feild of berries Ferburt?"
"i am not quite sure friend but what should i do?"
"hassle the quale master, he has the canned trees."
"ah yes, how could i forget"
Ferburt began digging again, and so the gnomes embarked on their tunnel adventure once again, Ferburt diggin, and the other two sitting in the cart drinking Milk. Ferburt was digging one day and found an empty cavern, with his soy torch he looked around the cavern to discover hand sized stamps hanging from the roof like bats, flying around to walls looking for grubs to eat.
Ferburt took out his shot-rifle and fired some shots at the stamps, one stamp was hit and was instantly set alight. The other stamps stopped with their behaviour and turned to this source of light that was attacking them. The stamps charged the gnomes, teeth bared. The gnomes took out their spoons and began beating at the stamps, the stamps screaming in pain, invigorated the gnomes and they began thrashing wildly at the stamps, with all their might and fury the gnomes defeated the stamps. They now inhabit their caverns, all old and wrinkley those gnomes with untold power and wisdom. Noone to this day has found them and noone ever will the end.

herds of noses

2007-07-24T14:34:00.000-07:00

There is a giant gland on the falling moon, it is commonly called ze nose.
an old man who was tired yet graceful inspected it from his distance of notability. after many days of quiet investigation he concluded his search, with little evidence supporting his initial theory. Though now he has gained knowledge enough to pursue other dreams, noone is really sure about him at all. And nor does any man, of admirable height, care of this old shrew and his ideas, for he is not of the gracened finchlass, as most commoners are.
Ah the gracened finchlass, a touchy subject, to be brief. It flew bearing the direction of the southern wind, to surface against the tide at 3:00 pm last tuesday. No person, of general calamity, understands the finchlass as it's true burdens are hidden by sheaths of cranberry soup. All of this burden seemingly puzzled by its untrue phalacy, contorted into the sand bag named jerkin who claimed to have seen several dancing she-males the night preceeding. An old bag made his way down the trumpet shaft in order to dance with the fastened leeks, though it found none, it danced alone for the night in curious hope of company. Stamp stamp stamp said the giant mushroom, if only i had more beets on my carved wooden steeple, my stamps would not be so misfortuned as to slip through the barricades of Farrow's Folly. Lamp lamp lamp, ramp ramp ramp, camp camp camp. Not one word spoken made any sense though he found comfort in the words anyway, insanity fuels itself and so he goes on being insane all day long, all night long forever and ever and ever. Its just like a love story, but this one came true
heeahahahhahahahaa

The dog, the clam and the angry old nose

2007-07-16T15:04:00.000-07:00

A dark room without an entrance once housed three creatures of various descent. The dog, the clam, and the nose. The dog and the clam has no feelings, but the nose was always angry. One day there was a knock at the door, though it didnt exist. And the old man inside the barrel rolled down the paveway to meet the new visitor. A turtle stamped on the walls and a frog felt like the moon as three children pranced on all fours. The noses nostrils flared as it got ready to complain to the clam and the dog, though they payed no attention. A crab made itself visible, though it really wasnt, and so the children on their hands and feet were confused. A large battle broke out between the crab vision and the children, in the future it was to be called the Clammingtons Feef, War of the Stampedes. The children fought valiantly, though without opponent of opposite faction they were forced into self destruction and cannibalism until only one half eaten child bled his was around wondering what had happened. He turned 12 degrees opposite to the coordinates of the sun to review the crab vision once again standing, mockingly snapping its claws. The child pulled out the stone in his heart which people tend to call the soul. He held it to his eyes and muttered some words before charging at the crab. The crab of course unphased by another foolish attempt of a child stood, clacking its snappers. The child though in one last effort consumed the image in rage, destroying the vision, himself and the far away crab, making its nuisance.
The result of this was a large nose, with 3 spider-like legs on each side, standing around. It was a beautiful nose, with amazing curves and orifices. The angry nose in the room sensed the arrival and stood on its hind legs, sniffing the vile air. The nose let out a mighty bellow and charged through the non existant door into the world of Milk. Into which he met the new nose. In his rage old nose powered up his fire channels and aimed slowly. The new nose, unaware and innocent was not prepared for the battle at hand, though it would soon learn. Angry nose fired away with his cannon like nostrils at the new nose. The new nose was knocked back and confused, it knew not of how or why this nose had attacked him, but soon regained its wits and hid quietly in waiting. The old nose blasted some more fire then got down low and started sniffing around to pick up the scent of the new nose.
While all of this was happening Clam and Dog had managed to also exit the room, both prepared for a fight against both new and old nose they began to charge their own arsenal. Dog was the first to fire upon old nose, with his bullet like beans firing quickly and accurately Old nose was taken off guard, and stunned briefly. This was New nose's chance to attack and so dived out from its hiding place to bite off one of old noses legs, then to quickly unfold its bat-like wings for an added boost of speed moved behinf a wall. Dog kept firing on Old nose as Clam made her way to the new noses hiding spot. Clams not known for their maneuverability would be impressed by the abilities of this one, boasting 4 tentacle like limbs Clam was able to move quickly and easily towards the hiding post of New nose, ready to unload her poisonous fumes then strike at New nose quickly with her pointed tongue, that at the tip held the character of rock. New nose once again surprised, but not as much took a blow to the upper ridge, but quickly fired back with bristles, sharp but innacurate the bristles hailed down upon clam. Clam closed her shell and withdrew her tentacles to be unaffected by the quills, but now aware of the noses abilities devised a new plan.
By now Old nose had managed to gain a foot hold, unsteady as he was, missing one leg, he still had 2 more on that side and so was not as badly maimed as he could have been. Old nose used telekenisis to throw large stones and orphan's remains at Dog. Dog, with striking speed and cunning dodged the rubble and carcasses and dived forward. Dogs always being loyal to their task, he kept his eye on the target and rushed for it, this was to be his strength and folly, as Dog would not make it to the end of the day alive.
New nose sprayed water all over Clam, and with admirable agility, froze the water, completely immobilizing Clam. New nose viewed Dog tackle and badly wound old Nose, and so New nose took his chance to strike at Dog with all his strength. New Nose powered up the light of Nosetar, more powerful than a super nova, and unloaded its complete power onto the combined target of Dog and Old Nose, completely destroying them both in an instant.
Clam, meanwhile was left in her icy chamber, unable to move, but able to watch the destruction of her best friend, and vile nemesis. She watched as New Nose now turned and stared upon her, awaiting her final release, a quick and painless death, that New Nose had given to Dog and Old Nose, she was dissapointed. New Nose stood and watched Clam for a short while, the clear ice a window into the room in which she was held. New Nose, unsure about how to deal with this decided that he would not in face destroy Clam. New Nose summoned a dark room, in which he caged Clam. Inside this he left a part of his body, which soon formed into a new nose, and a dark scrawny dog, to sit for eternity in immortal suffering.

back to the blog

2007-07-11T07:46:00.000-07:00

havent been posting in this shithole for a little while so i thought id pacify the 0 readers of it
roger has been gone now for 2 and a half weeks, and its been long enough
who the fuck takes their kids on a 6 week holiday... grr at her mum grr
i feel so fucking bored, and desperate... i have absolutely nothing to do
i cant actually speak to anyone... i have noone i can have physical contact with either
i have noone that cares abou me... which aint so fucking fun
if her trip is extended, im going to implode... its too long its too fucking long already
its no fun around here without her at all, like sure i got WoW but i want cecilia... not some computer game -.-"
i hate how this happens :'( those who mean a lot, or more than barely anything are always taken away
always
or i desert them
or im taken away
or they desert me
this is shit why does it always have to be me being deserted...
well fuck this im sick of being fucking deserted, if it fucking keeps up i feel like deserting everything else cause none of it will give a fuck, nothing about me matters enough to keep someone around, to keep them listening or talking or interacting

Grandola Ep2

2007-07-03T01:38:00.001-07:00

Episode 2 of the epic tale

Awesome Cartoon

2007-07-02T12:25:00.001-07:00

Produced by Pucas and Korben i present to thee
THE FIRST EPISODE OF GRANDOLA ADVENTURES!!!

The following video is rated PG, it contains supernatural themes and scary voices by horny 16 year old boys, Parental Guidance is suggested.
The following video is restricted to private viewing and is not to be diplayed publically without permission for or not for profit. All rights reserved to Pucas Trade Company And The Korben Lizard Farm Certified.
No this film was not made with crayons tho it was an idea we thought of.
ENJOY

The tale of Nosebury Candlesmith

2007-07-01T09:10:00.001-07:00

Tarnished petals of a once prosperous tower-burd covered the dusty and scathed battleground. Underneath the petals lay loose grey dust on a pock - marked dry soil. The wind picked up the dust but not the petals as it swept through the devestated landscape, the reason being that the leaves themselves, coming from a tower-burd were made of solid stone, but a red stone which may trick the unsuspecting wanderer in the forest. Across the landscape lay some decaying bodies of children that had been victim to the destruction. The destruction being that cause by the Grand-Battle Finch of the Northern Lorses and his minor finches in a fight for their freedom from the enslavement of Lord Seal-Fucker, that fucked seals. Within their attempt for escape the Finches created grand explosive beans and cast them at all around them in an attempt to destroy the walls that held them. Though their timing was of immaculate seduction the finches had made their Bombs far too powerful and in fact destroyed a good half of the world with themselves. Luckily though for the finches, as powerful beings they reincarnate and so were not phased by the explosions and their deaths.
The finches now circled the grand Feeb stone in an attempt to summon a Crab of Naosoth but the giant troll called lamb stamped in and started telling them about crayons and swilleys until the finches cawed and died from the smell of Lamb's breath, and breast infections. Lamb ate a whole whale that evening and said to himself "soy is good...SOY IS GOOD!" then Lamb was attacked by the wolf thing pucas and fell to the ground writhing like a new born baby, strangled by the umbilical cord. Lamb soiled himself with his troll powers and made pucas run away. Lamb walked over to his closet and pulled out a small child, raped and stabbed it then went to bed.
The end