The tale of Nosebury Candlesmith

Tarnished petals of a once prosperous tower-burd covered the dusty and scathed battleground. Underneath the petals lay loose grey dust on a pock - marked dry soil. The wind picked up the dust but not the petals as it swept through the devestated landscape, the reason being that the leaves themselves, coming from a tower-burd were made of solid stone, but a red stone which may trick the unsuspecting wanderer in the forest. Across the landscape lay some decaying bodies of children that had been victim to the destruction. The destruction being that cause by the Grand-Battle Finch of the Northern Lorses and his minor finches in a fight for their freedom from the enslavement of Lord Seal-Fucker, that fucked seals. Within their attempt for escape the Finches created grand explosive beans and cast them at all around them in an attempt to destroy the walls that held them. Though their timing was of immaculate seduction the finches had made their Bombs far too powerful and in fact destroyed a good half of the world with themselves. Luckily though for the finches, as powerful beings they reincarnate and so were not phased by the explosions and their deaths.
The finches now circled the grand Feeb stone in an attempt to summon a Crab of Naosoth but the giant troll called lamb stamped in and started telling them about crayons and swilleys until the finches cawed and died from the smell of Lamb's breath, and breast infections. Lamb ate a whole whale that evening and said to himself "soy is good...SOY IS GOOD!" then Lamb was attacked by the wolf thing pucas and fell to the ground writhing like a new born baby, strangled by the umbilical cord. Lamb soiled himself with his troll powers and made pucas run away. Lamb walked over to his closet and pulled out a small child, raped and stabbed it then went to bed.
The end